1st Sgt of Marines Leads Marines by Sleeping on Combat Patrol

first sergeant bernard jackson, sergeant major bernard jackson

1st Sgt of Marines, Bernard Jackson Leading his marines by sleeping on a combat patrol. Bravo Battery 1/11 – Iraq – 2007

In March 2006, Sergeant Major Jackson reported to 1st Battalion, 11th Marine Regiment, where he was assigned as the Bravo Battery First Sergeant. While assigned to Bravo Battery, Sergeant Major Jackson served in combat operations with 3d Battalion, 1st Marines, 13th Marine Expeditionary Unit (Special Operations Capable) in Operation Iraqi Freedom 6-8.

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http://www.imef.marines.mil/Leaders/Article/535485/sergeant-major-jackson/ 

Marine Doesnt Take Shit From SNCO

The way this guy getting yelled at conducts himself is pretty funny.

I have highlighted some of my favorite comments from this video from youtube. You can tell who are the retard motivators, and who are the guys who are down to earth.

That Marine getting his ass chewed shouldh’ve locked his body and took the original ass chewing. Thats the way of the Corps for those of you who don’t understand it is an autocratic leadership style. I loved seeing ass chewing like this and had plenty happen to me for no reason as well. Get Some! I love this shit!
MillerRobby

and then NJP his ass. Fuck em and feed em beans!
blackamericanman

WHAT THE FUCK IS THE MARINE CORPS COMING TO? WHEN I WAS A TROOP I WOULDN’T DARE TALK BACK TO MY SUPERIORS, THESE TROOPS NOW A DAYS ARE GETTING WAY TO FUCKING CONFIDENT AND FULL OF THEMSELVES, LET A MOTHERFUCKING JUNIOR DEVIL DOG TALK BACK TO ME LIKE THAT AND HE WILL FIND HIMSELF AS A PRIVATE THE VERY NEXT DAY!!!
195WTF

hes in legal plt. these are basically the turds of the Marine Corp. The ones that popped on a drug test ect. so they are about to be discharged anyway. Any real Marine knows even when your right youre still wrong. So stand and at parade rest shut your mouth and listen to whatever your superior is saying. This kid clearly has no respect for the Marine Corp.
billyouknow

Yeah, yeah. Everyone’s a tough guy once they put on the kill suit. You have an over the top black NCO (presumably) and some fat-ass other wing man basically doing nothing but yelling at a Marine for what? It could have been a penis length contest, who knows.
BrownLabRanch

And they wonder why there are high numbers of suicides in the Army and Marines…it’s because they discipline by cussing and yelling instead of simply addressing the issue professionally
jusitke07

hes lucky he didnt get his ass beat dont raise ur arms to ur CO just shut up and take it.
gtojoe04

oh yes she S*** bags. this is prolly the funniest ass chewing i’ve seen. in my old command there was a sgt. and im not gonna say who, forceful pins people against the walls. sometimes hits them….then agiain he’s kinda bi-polar. and retired now
Linebacker4407

I dont know who these Marines are but for all those wondering what happened, my guess, and any soldier can probably back me up, the junior Marines probably did something that got an NCO’s ass Chewed. And we all no shit rolls down hill.
mrandall101010

i find it interesting that the guy is getting chewed out so, the black guy is a higher rank right? after all hes doing the chewing. so why isnt the other guy at parade rest or position of attention?
bonfu1

I was a Corpsman, I was a Navy boy and I didn’t take this kind of abuse, if it came down to screaming “shut the fuck up” in my face, then it was either time to walk away or throw down. Angry Marines spent a lot of time screaming at my back. Nothing makes a Marine more angry then letting him know his swagger in uniform aint shit to me.
lolomgwtfpwnt

yeah, there’s a simpler term to that. its called “Building Character”.
Halolgendary

And that’s the very definition of brainwashing
chaoseffect999

What a lot of you don’t understand is that this is all necessary. How can you expect someone to go into war if they can’t handle extreme situations. They WILL push you to your limit in every way because if one day they are put in the situation with an enemy they will handle it better. If they don’t teach him to shut up now, then what would happen if he gets captured while deployed? He’ll lose any chance of survival if he acts like that….
Carolinear1

Some turds just don’t understand, if you bite your tongue and only say yes, no or aye aye, there is no ass chewing… And if there is a need for an ass chewing, best way to keep it short is using the simple answers… Yes, No and Aye aye… The ones talking back are just asking to get jumped by other nco’s, and god knows how long it’ll last if a snco gets involved…
beirut1papa

 

Fleet Marine Life #9 – Farmer’s Choice

2011-04-04-fleetmarinelife9 - Farmer's Choice

A lot of young Americans have done drugs. It ain’t a bad thing and it shouldn’t affect them for the most part. Some of these young Americans then wish to join the military. Recruiters need bodies to join. So they’re willing to help these young Americans join.

But people who may have a heavy addiction to drugs are inclined to use them again in the Marine Corps. The Marine Corps has a zero tolerance drug policy. So if a Marine pops once for ecstasy or for weed, then they get kicked out with a negative discharge.

It costs somewhere around $13,000 – 25,000 to train one Marine Recruit and then the government has to pay that one Marine for his service. It’s tax payer money down the drain.

Recruiting people with a history of heavy drug usage isn’t exactly the best thing to do but since the Marine Corps needs bodies, they are willing to lower the standards.

I don’t know why Active Duty Marines do drugs despite knowing that they will have the occasional drug test and the knowledge of what will happen to them if they get caught. It’s just dumb.

Peeing in cups since 1775. K.

Fleet Marine Life #8 – Why God Why?

2011-04-03-fleetmarinelife8 - Why God Why

I thought this was funny. If you don’t think it’s funny then you probably don’t know what VEERP is or you’re probably the CO.

In case you don’t know, VEERP means Voluntary Enlisted Early Release Program. It’s a MARADMIN for non-motivators so that they can get out up to 90 days early. I put the link up in the “A Few Good Links” section.

In today’s comic, this particular company’s building went on fire, most likely from natural causes, and destroyed the Corporal’s chance from getting out 90 days early with terminal leave on top of that.

VEERP makes Chesty Puller cry. K.

Fleet Marine Life #7 – The Recruiter

2011-04-02-fleetmarinelife7 - The RecruiterRecruiters are “shysty.” They have to push people in the Corps and it’s their job to get numbers. Unfortunately, recruiters do anything possible from forging High School diplomas to recruiting autistic people from a home for autistic kids. I ain’t lying about that last one.

Recruiters are known for lying and misleading people. Ask your fellow Marine what he has been promised by his recruiter and ask him if he got it. More than likely, he’ll say that he got the big fat green weenie.

Don’t worry though. They kicked him out of the Corps because he was caught with child porn. Several times.

Anyways, where is this character named Joe Jay going? Alcoholism? Drug abuse? Who knows…

Recruiting Autistic Kids since 1775. K.

RecrutingPF-CoverTimelineRecrutingPF-Where

Fleet Marine Life #6 – An Idea is Born

[I joined the Marines in 2006. It is 2011 (almost 2012) and I have yet to climb a giant cliff only to confront an fire breathing dragon and a SNCO sword… With that said, enjoy one of the earlier FML comics about some idiot joining the Marines because of a commercial with a bit too much fantasy. ~S_The_Mod]

 

2011-04-01-fleetmarinelife6-Origin-of-Madness

 

Now, those who have joined the Marine Corps have been sucked into the idea of this “different world” where you slay dragons while driving your tank with hot women clamoring at your body. But it is the exact opposite. You will not slay dragons. You will not drive tanks. You will not have women clamoring at you and if they are, they are probably men.

What do you do if you don’t get to slay dragons all day and night? Stay awhile and find out.

Slaying dragons since 1775. K.

 

Fleet Marine Life #5 – Dumpster

2011-03-31-fleetmarinelife5 - Dumpster

A lot of Marines warned me about Camp Lejeune and how it sucks ass. So I avoided it. For the majority of my time, I was in Okinawa. It felt like I was in a kind of USMC funded island prison for the insane. It was called Okitraz. I will discuss this more in future topics.

Police calling since November 10, 1775. K.

Fleet Marine Life #4 – Safety Vehicle

2011-03-30-fleetmarinelife4 - Safety Vehicle

There’s the US Marine Corps and then there’s the US Army. They both mainly fight on land in today’s modern times. But what is the difference?

The difference is mostly in history and appearance. But that’s just the surface. Internally, the Marine Corps has a much higher standard than that of the US Army and that is why the USMC is better. But why not just raise the standards of the US Army? It’s because they need people.

If you ask the average US citizen which of the two is better, 99% of the time they will say the Marine Corps. The other 1% are probably in the US Army.

As a Marine in the fleet, you start to see some problems. Some standards aren’t held or don’t exist. If you would like to know more about these problems, stay tuned…

Good standards are key. K.

Fleet Marine Life #3 – Take a Bite Out of Crime

2011-03-29-fleetmarinelife3 - Take a Bite Out of Crime

I would be lying to you if I said this never happened. If the Military Police sent their dogs after you and it bit you, you would probably just give up. Not bite the dog back.

In case you don’t know, Marines are dumb. I’m no exception. We all are. Once we sign that contract at the nearest Military Entrance Processing Station (MEPS), our brain just takes a vacation. When does your brain come back from vacation? Cpl Person from Generation Kill best says it.

Cpl. Josh Ray Person: You know what happens when you get out of the Marine Corps? You get your brains back.

This guy in the comics is what you refer to as, “That Guy.” The average Marine who is sick and tired of maltreatment in the Corps. He needs an escape from reality and the cheap plane he is steering is named drunkenness and alcohol is his co-pilot. It usually ends in the Marine waking up and realizing that he has created a problem. Mine usually involves me taking 2 hour showers and cleaning up my room for 3 hours on a Monday afternoon.

Alcohol is my co-pilot. K.

Fleet Marine Life #2 – Day 1000

2011-03-28-fleetmarinelife2 - Day 1000

Usually when a Marine is fresh out of boot camp, he is highly motivated with his high and stupid (high and tight) and full of Oorahs and Semper Fis. Usually this is all he can say at this point. Then it evolves from that to Yut, Yut, Yut to Errrrs and finally to the point where nothing is said because of all the non-evolved Marines who usually say something (e.g Yut and Ers). And if a highly evolved Marine needs to respond, then that response will be an Er and only ONE Er.

Now as time passes, this highly motarded Marine will be withered down to a shell of his once former self. What withers such a Marine down? Well, you’ll have to find out in the future comics.

Cream Corn, K.

Fleet Marine Life #1 – Hello There!

2011-03-27-fleetmarinelife1 - Hello there

I’ve started this site thanks to the encouragement of two fellow Marines. Cpl B and Lcpl E.

Fleet Marine Life (FML) will feature the various adventures of many Marines in various Personnel Other than Grunt (POG) jobs. This website is meant to make fun of the things that happen in the US Marine Corps. A lot of things in the Marine Corps don’t make sense and that pisses me off and a lot of other fellow Marines off. This web comic is meant to capitalize off that nonsense to help fellow Marines laugh and reflect off these events.

Right now, my buddy Cpl H is next to me reading my journals. He finds a lot of humor in the nonsense of the events that have occurred to me.

Anyways… I hope you enjoy this site as a lot of my fellow Marines will.

Please check often for frequent updates. Semper Fries, K.

The 13 Days of Marine Corps Christmas

With the holidays coming up, we wanted to get into the holiday spirit. So we decided to post up a very Christmasy post. Enjoy!

The 13 Days of Marine Corps Christmas (Sang to the tune of “The 12 Days of Christmas”)

On the First Day of Christmas the Marine Corps Gave to me: A Chance To Witness an NJP!

On the Second Day of Christmas the Marine Corps Gave to me: 2 Bitchy Roommates, and A Chance To Witness an NJP!

On the Third Day of Christmas the Marine Corps Gave to me: 3 Drill Instructors, 2 Bitchy Roommates, and A Chance To Witness an NJP!

On the Fourth Day of Christmas the Marine Corps Gave to me: 4 Page 11s, 3 Drill Instructors, 2 Bitchy Roommates, and A Chance To Witness an NJP!

On the Fifth Day of Christmas the Marine Corps Gave to me: 5 6105s, 4 Page 11s, 3 Drill Instructors, 2 Bitchy Roommates, and A Chance To Witness an NJP!

On the Sixth Day of Christmas the Marine Corps Gave to me: 6 Counseling Sheets, 5 6105s, 4 Page 11s, 3 Drill Instructors, 2 Bitchy Roommates, and A Chance To Witness an NJP!

On the Seventh Day of Christmas the Marine Corps Gave to me: 7 MCIs, 6 Counseling Sheets, 5 6105s, 4 Page 11s, 3 Drill Instructors, 2 Bitchy Roommates, and A Chance To Witness an NJP!

On the Eighth Day of Christmas the Marine Corps Gave to me: 8 Uniform Inspections, 7 MCIs, 6 Counseling Sheets, 5 6105s, 4 Page 11s, 3 Drill Instructors, 2 Bitchy Roommates, and A Chance To Witness an NJP!

On the Ninth Day of Christmas the Marine Corps Gave to me: 9 Safety Briefs, 8 Uniform Inspections, 7 MCIs, 6 Counseling Sheets, 5 6105s, 4 Page 11s, 3 Drill Instructors, 2 Bitchy Roommates, and A Chance To Witness an NJP!

On the Tenth Day of Christmas the Marine Corps Gave to me: 10 Field Day Formations, 9 Safety Briefs, 8 Uniform Inspections, 7 MCIs, 6 Counseling Sheets, 5 6105s, 4 Page 11s, 3 Drill Instructors, 2 Bitchy Roommates, and A Chance To Witness an NJP!

On the Eleventh Day of Christmas the Marine Corps Gave to me: 11 days UA, 10 Field Day Formations, 9 Safety Briefs, 8 Uniform Inspections, 7 MCIs, 6 Counseling Sheets, 5 6105s, 4 Page 11s, 3 Drill Instructors, 2 Bitchy Roommates, and A Chance To Witness an NJP!

On the Twelth Day of Christmas the Marine Corps Gave to me: 12 Ass Chewings, 11 days UA, 10 Field Day Formations, 9 Safety Briefs, 8 Uniform Inspections, 7 MCIs, 6 Counseling Sheets, 5 6105s, 4 Page 11s, 3 Drill Instructors, 2 Bitchy Roommates, and A Chance To Witness an NJP!

On the Thirteenth Day of Christmas the Marine Corps Gave to me: 13 Weeks Restriction, 12 Ass Chewings, 11 days UA, 10 Field Day Formations, 9 Safety Briefs, 8 Uniform Inspections, 7 MCIs, 6 Counseling Sheets, 5 6105s, 4 Page 11s, 3 Drill Instructors, 2 Bitchy Roommates, and A Chance To Witness an NJP!

Submitted by NINJA_PUNCH

Fleet Marine Life – Characters

Joe Jay – The average US citizen turned US Marine. Likes weed.

Shitbag Steve – A shitty Marine. Always fucking it up for everyone else. NJP Magnet.

The Staff Sergeant – A bitter shell of a man who drives his Marines like slaves and then writes awards for himself. He’s a highly brainwashed, high-and-tight wearing asshole you hope to god never gets put in charge of you or your platoon. Injustice is his middle name and fuck-fuck is the games he plays. His hobbies include fucking junior Marines over and finding ways to advance his career at the expense of others.

A Good Sergeant – He’s always trying to do the right thing… unfortunately, at the expense of his career.

PFC Moto – A highly motivated, fresh out of boot camp Marine. He enjoys saying OORAH and SEMPER FI as much as he loves doing work . Does all the work and never gets acknowledged.

The General – Thousands of Marines must follow the insane whims of this man who wears a shiny silver star on his collar.

The Corpsman (Doc) – Maltreatment is thy middle name.