Fleet Marine Life #32 – Wingman

2011-04-27-fleetmarinelife32 - Wingman

One thing you don’t want to bring when you go out drinking is another Marine. God it’s terrible. A countless number of things can go wrong. It’s too many to list so I’ll turn them into comics in the future.

They had a bar in Okinawa, Japan named, “Globe and Anchor” but Marines called it the the Hook and Jab because so many stupid and drunk Marines fought each other there over something as stupid as the way another drunk Marine looks.

Drunk Marine 1 : I don’t like the way you’re just standing there!
Drunk Marine 2 : Them’s fightin’ words!
Drunk Marine 1 : Let’s fight!

Alcoholism is part of the Marine Corps tradition. And we suffer greatly because of it. A lot of Marines drink and drive 120 mph into the nearest tree. And then the Marines that are still alive in that command all receive a 3 hour long safety stand-down on “how not to drink and then drive your car 120 mph into the nearest tree.” Whenever I receive these briefs, it is a struggle to stay awake. I could have slept for 10 hours yesterday but it’s like some sort of dark magic that these speakers cast on all of us.

The best way to stay awake is by not paying attention. I’ll blankly stare ahead, with my mouth gaping open, and think about how much I want to get the fuck out of the Marine Corps and what I’m going to do out of it.

But why do Marines drink? They drink to escape the shitty reality that they are in. It’s escapism.

Driving into trees since 1775.