Oh, how I have been lured by the song of the sirens! This has only happened to me a few times in my life. Unfortunately, it all happened with other Marines.
Another Marine and I were bored in the barracks. I had money to burn so I said, “Hey, let’s go to the local shooting range. You drive me there and I’ll pay for everything. I expect to spend two to three hundred dollars.” We went there, shot off a lot of rounds and used a lot of different weapons. After I paid the $200 bill, my buddy said, “Hey, lets go to this all-you-can-eat sushi place. I’ll pay for it.”
I was excited because I love sushi. We went there, sat down and ordered a few things. He got a text message from his girl. He looked at it, then he looked at me and said, “Hey, I got to go.” I replied, “But we just got here!” “Yeah, but I got to go.” “Fine, just pay the bill.” He took out his wallet, opened it up, looked in it, paused for a few seconds, looked at me and said, “Dawg… I ain’t got no money.” I laughed and then yelled at him. “Use your card!” “Dawg, it doesn’t work.” I growled at him and then paid for the bill.
The face he had when he opened his empty wallet was serious. Like an award-winning actor’s! I wouldn’t be able to keep a straight face if I had to pay the bill but had no money.
Of course he paid me back the $50… after 8 months and constant pestering. I think back to it and can’t help but laugh.
If you’re a Marine, carry around some god damn cash. You ain’t friggin’ 5 years old!
The day I submitted my Voluntary Enlisted Early Release Program (VEERP) package to my regiment, I went to Panda Express and got this from my fortune cookie.