Broken Down, But Never Built Back Up

I know my grammar might not be great but I’m not really worried about that right now. I spent 8 months in Boot Camp, watched my original platoon graduate without me, and it feels that I haven’t really moved on from boot camp.

I joined in 2006 and the first week of boot camp I don’t remember taking a shit, the first time I ever pissed in my bed while sleeping, and just felt terrorized. I got through the first say 3 weeks and I got sick with pneumonia and didn’t wake up with the rest of the platoon on time. The DI shoved me off the top rack and I hit the floor, went to the hospital, and got dropped and put into MRP. From then on I got sick multiple time with bronchitis and pneumonia back and forth because I was around it all the time. The 3rd month I was called to clean on the other side of the parade deck, and that’s where I got to watch my platoon and the company while cleaning the windows.

Shortly after I was placed in a company just before going Phase 2. I had gotten pneumonia again a couple weeks after being with that company. Dropped again, got better, and joined another. During our physical training I had touched my face and 4 DI’s came over and started screaming in my face, I couldn’t understand what they were saying at all, was being spit in my face by all of them, burning my eyes and dangling from my chin with pain in my inner ear from the volume. I remember after doing a run with our gear on I slipped and fell on the stairs, a DI grabbed me pulled me up to our barracks, and I was forced to drink water from a disgusting canteen over and over again. I couldn’t drink anymore and threw it up all over the place in the middle of the DI highway where I was. I had to clean it up and by that time the day was over, needless to say I had 3 night watches that night. I woke up and started getting dressed and a DI came over and slammed my head into the metal rack. I was punched in the gut I would say 3 or 4 times in my time there, I’m talking full punches with their arm swung back all the way.

Anyways I got through Phase 2 and got dropped again for bronchitis. I just didn’t have any will left, I was depressed and I just felt like I couldn’t got on anymore. Then I got a infected ingrown toenail and before lights out when the DI’s inspect you he saw it and put his heel on my toe and pushed down. He asked if that hurt and I said no with tears coming out of my eyes, I later was taken to the hospital where they put 3 shots in my toe to numb it before taking it out. The guy took some scissors and started cutting down the middle and I screamed with pain cuz I could still feel, after 3 more shots it was removed. I got back with another company and finished phase 3 without my blue’s because something was going on I don’t know I was never told. During the ceremony I never felt better, I never felt like I accomplished anything. I have never said Oorah because I just never wanted to, even when people say it to me nowadays. I regret ever going and I wish it never happened. My toe nail grows with a space in between the nail and it just reminds me of the pain everyday. I’m not saying that I got it worse or better, this is just what happened to me.

After boot camp the hazing never stopped and eventually I did a tour in Iraq. We returned to Iowa, and I never went back, I quit. I was given an Other than Honorable Discharge. I wrote this because someone got in my face yesterday and I just had a breakdown, so I had to get this out somehow. Thanks for reading and excusing my writing skills…


Submitted by “Michael Power”

  • Mike

    Sounds like you had a hard go at it, but it also sounds like you need to grow a pair and move on. A lot of people had it hard like you or worse. The Marines is not easy, I will never understand why people joining thinking it is.

    • FailedToAdapt

      Hey Mike,

      I think most people join knowing that the Marine’s won’t be easy. That is why most join the USMC over the other branches! However, I do not think anyone expects to be treated like a subhuman. Abuse does not equal training. It is not constructive to creating an elite war fighter. It just creates a crippled human being. There, lies the difference.

      If you think being treated like less of a human being is normal and satisfactory, then I think you have an unhealthy world view and your relationships probably suffer as a result.

      I assume posting this testimonial is healing for Michael Power’s and it may be helping him move on. Telling someone to “grow a pair” is not gonna help the man and it is not gonna solve the problems the MC faces.

      Have a nice day!

      • S.

        Simply beautiful

      • “Home Alone”

        You sir, have won the internet for today.

  • usmc_to_usaf
    Oh look at the motards in the comments section there^
    Can someone possibly breakdown to me how being completely defenseless to a froggy-voiced sounding grown man as he bullies you and beats you can prepare anyone for war? It really baffles me. I don’t suppose the beatings will make them stronger when they get deployed, the Iraqees and other adversaries will wear funny looking hats to abuse them too?

    • bootasfuck

      I’m just going to play devil’s advocate for a bit here, mate, so bear with me. One of my good friends is an ex-Marine Corps Sergeant who did his four and hit the door. HATED it with a passion. HE told me that punching recruits can be used to an extent, to help teach recruits to keep functioning even after they’ve been shot. And, I’ve been shot before, and it does kind of feel like being punched.
      HOWEVER, I am also a Muay Thai kickboxer, and I can honestly say that did more to strengthen my body and teach me to keep going than anything in boot camp.
      That being said, I was only punched once in boot camp, and it was by a DI who I didn’t see, and he literally backed into me, then punched me right in the middle of the spine. Primary difference between Muay Thai and boot camp; if you get hit in the dojo…you’re pretty much expected to hit back with at least as much force.

  • sp8887

    Fuck ya,I joined because I wanted to learn how to fight, kick some ass, my recruiter lied right out of his pog ass. I didn’t learn a fkn thing on how to fight, they teach you enough to get your ass kicked, Brazilian jiu jitsu and mma changed my life in a way the corps could never imagined

  • mmafan3 .

    This man has a set of brass balls, MIke for sharing his story. I have more respect for him and others on here for coming out with their different and eye opening accounts. Their stories make my experiences pale in comparisson and I put up with a LOT of shit during my time in. I and may I also say WE knew the Corps is not easy. I wouldn’t have had it any other way. However, you don’t degrade, demean and devalue a person for the hell of it. People who do get off on this have no balls and are lacking something else as well. We are all grown men and women here. Ninja’s and others testimonies have helped me to move on as well.

  • Donaldg

    You honestly sound like the biggest pussy I’ve ever hear of. Man up. You simply got you ass kicked and now come to a website full of other fuck ups and cry about how bad you suck. You should be ashamed

    • Older Marine Vet

      “website full of other fuck ups ”
      Since you are obviously TOO STUPID to realise this, most of the people who contribute to this web site were those who made a valuable contribution to the Corps, got out on Honorable Discharges, and post the dumb, idiotic, inefficient and bureaucratic stupidity we were forced to put up when fulfilling the obligations of our contract! It also exposes some of the retards who gain positions of power in the Corps, mainly because they are too stupid to do anything of value in the real world, and get off on bullying and harassing people for their own personal amusement!
      I’ve said this before-if this individual couldn’t hack boot camp and failed to meet the basic standards, then the Corps should be a lot more efficient at out-processing such recruits- it shouldn’t take more than 2 weeks! Recruits should be given the choice to discontinue if they are unsuitable for the organisation.
      Drill Instructors have a hard job, but there is no excuse for cruel and unusual punishment when training recruits! This guy might not have been able to hack boot camp, but drill instructor abuse is still abuse no matter who reports it!
      Lastly, I personally would not tolerate a Marine full of mindless aggression trying to pick a fight with me simply because I dare to criticise the Corps. If you want to play the ‘whose dick is bigger’ game us veterans are just as well versed in weaponry and tactics as you are- but have a semblance of maturity and perspective to know that the USMC does not live up to its propaganda no matter how much you wish it would!
      Are you a “pussy”? Would you allow someone to hit, bully and abuse you and not have the courage to stand up for yourself?

      • S.

        Well said brother.

    • fieldradiohater

      you sound like some one I know…Drill Instructor, Recon, Combat Vet, 21 ribbons, wounded warrior….wait a minute MAN of all MEN…you were a supply guy, He comes off just like you…until you know I didnt take his shit anymore, resulted in me having to apologise (which I didnt… told him to go fuck himeself) to the guy while he pouted and cried like a “pussy”…ARE you one of those “MEN” im talking about Donaldg? The more some one Brags about being a man….NEVER EVER FAILS…never

  • USMarineCaptain

    Well “Michael Power”, it’s very unfortunate that you and other individuals were forced to endure this type of treatment by the hands of very few “men” who were supposed to be training you to become a Marine. I am a former Series Commander, XO, CO and OpsO at Parris Island…..and as I told every DI under my command – If you (they) abused a recruit I would handle it very differently than the UCMJ. I would have let you beat that Drill Instructor had I ever caught rumor of that happening under my watch.
    We are all human beings and deserve to be treated as such regardless of the current “station” in life or training. It won’t ever stop because there will always be small people in the world and in the USMC, Army, USN, USAF….. I served 4 tours in Iraq…..and all I can say is thank you for the tour you did put in. Let the rest go….live with purpose and lead others the way they should be led. Other Than Honorable? Not in my eyes….you’re a damn fine man.

    • S.

      This is certainly a change of direction from your first post calling everyone on this site stupid. If you can keep the rest of your comments like this one, you are very welcome to stay. If not, you will lose the privilege. Please conduct yourself like a captain while on this website.

  • When God does not inhabit the hearts of a people…evil stuff like this happens.

    When King David ruled in Israel for 40 years, I do not believe that his men had to endure any sort of hazing or dehumanizing behavior. I’m sure life as a soldier was tough and demanding — but there was godly love and compassion for one’s fellow man, at the same time.

    • M

      The Corps attracts more than its fair share of bible-bashing religious nuts, and I think you are a fucking idiot!
      how the Hell would you know how David ran his army? You think divine blessing is going excuse soldiers from standing fire watch?

      • I know by reading and trusting in God’s Word, the Holy Bible, sir.

        And what allegedly happened to the young man in this article saddens and disgusts me. Where were “the highest standards of morality” when this man was being abused by a Drill Instructor — in forcing him to drink water from a canteen until he threw up all over the ground? Where was “integrity” when another D.I. slammed that young man’s head into a metal rack for no reason? And why would anyone, in their right mind, press the heel of their boot down onto someone’s infected, ingrown toenail?

        That’s not love for one’s fellow man; nor properly preparing someone for the rigors of the battlefield.

        That’s evil.

        • Billiam201

          “Love for one’s fellow man”?

          Please. If I hadn’t been sitting down, I would have fallen over.

          That pesky bible you just invoked spends half of its pages demanding the death of those that disagree with your particular holy mythology.

          Given that the Bible commands that babies be dashed on rocks and the virgin girls of the city you just took be kept alive to be gang-raped, I’d say it is automatically disqualified as a moral reference.

          • Would you mind quoting those alleged commands for me, sir/ma’am?

            Reason being, you may be surprised to know that most of the Old Testament commands in the Bible to kill were directed towards tribes that weren’t entirely human…that is to say, they were giant hybrids.

            For instance, have you heard of the special operations unit in Afghanistan that got into a life-or-death firefight with the “Giant of Kandahar”?

          • Billiam201

            Why certainly.

            Let’s start with rape.

            “If a man is caught in the act of raping a young woman who is not engaged (or who is a Virgin, depending on the translation) he must pay 50 pieces of silver to her father. He must then marry her because he violated her, and he will never be allowed to divorce her.” Deuteronomy 22:28-29

            Can you think of anything more immoral or sickening than forcing your daughter to marry, and submit forever to, the beast that raped her?

            Personally, if it were my daughter, I’d be killing him once I found him, not sending him a bill.

            Shall I continue?


            Earlier in the same chapter, we find the penalty for raping married women to be stoning both of them to death. Because she plainly had something to do with being raped in public.

            Or do you prefer treating women as the spoils of war? “They must divide the spoils they took, and there must be a damsel or two for each man, spoils of dyed cloth as Sisera’s spoil, an ornate shawl or two for me” Judges 5:30. If that one doesn’t suit you, try Deuteronomy 21:10-14, where at least this sick and perverted sky wizard tells you to allow the woman you captured to mourn her parents (that you killed) before dragging her to your bed against her will, where she has to submit to her forever. “…if you see a comely woman among the captives you may take her to your house…after she has mourned her father and mother for a full month you may have relations with her…you shall not sell her or enslave her, since she was married to you under compulsion”

            Nice guy, huh?

            My personal favorite is when Moses attacked Midian (I’ll further point out that the midianites were “children of Abraham”, for what that is worth) when, after killing all of the men he commanded that all of the boys and the women who were not virgins ALSO be killed, and that the virgins be “kept for themselves.”

            Let’s not forget about Lot who, when faced with an angry mob, offered his daughters to be gang-raped, and for this he is praised as a righteous man.

            And as far as your horse-hockey claim of the Giant of Kandahar, here:


            I know that won’t phase you, and I know you don’t care about actual facts, but I figured I would share it anyway.

          • M

            I try not to get too drawn into religious arguments. I once had to share a barracks room with an extreme Bible thumper, and it was a miserable experience for both of us.
            Bottom line: I respect beliefs of Christians, and respect the right of people to worship Allah if they want. The line gets crossed when they start killing people over religious zealotry.
            The problem with extremely indoctrinated Church nuts is that they tend to have very sheltered and unrealistic views about how the real world works.
            Evil, cruel and unjust things happen in the world (and the Marine Corps) everyday. Some join the Corps because they think they are on some holy crusade, But that’s not how it is in real life.
            Adam- I respect your Bible, your God, and the conviction of your belief. But just don’t force your extremes on me.
            No more discussion.

          • M, it is not my desire to force anything related to the Bible upon you. I do understand, also, that cruel and unjust things happen in many other places in this world besides the military.

            I was actually watching military videos on YouTube before seeing a link to this website in the comments section. And then, seeing that this site used DISQUS, I wanted to comment also on this article.

            I pray that the guy in the article will obtain peace and forgiveness regarding what happened (and for the D.I.s, as well).

    • Adam, King David sent Uriah to his death so he could have his wife, Bathsheba. It’s in the Book of Samuel.

      • You are correct on that, Chris. Sadly, David’s lust for Bathsheba (when he should have been on the battlefield with his men) led him into not only sleeping with her — but trying to cover his backside by sending Uriah out into a hotspot to be killed in action.

        I didn’t think of that when typing my post, above. It’s truly a black mark on an otherwise honorable reign on the throne.

        • Billiam201

          Otherwise honorable, you say?

          How about also in Samuel, when David slaughtered the entire population of nations in order to cover for his behavior which he knew to be wrong. We know that’s why he did it, because it says so, right there in the book of Samuel. 27:8-11. “…and David saved no man or woman alive…lest they should tell of us…”

          He knew what he did was wrong, and slaughtered otherwise innocent people to cover it up.

          Real pillar of morality there.

          • Billiam, would you agree that attention to detail is important — especially when a recruit is in the process of, say, memorizing a Marine’s general orders? And wouldn’t a D.I. immediately discipline that recruit if he/she got just a tiny detail wrong?

            The reason I’m opening with this appeal to you is to urge to you carefully read my quoting out of that passage in I Samuel 27. There are specific details in those verses I want to point out:

            I Samuel 27:7-11

            …(7)And the time that David dwelt in the country of the Philistines was a full year and four months.

            (8)And David and his men went up, and invaded the Geshurites, and the Gezrites, and the Amalekites: for those nations were of old the inhabitants of the land, as thou goest to Shur, even unto the land of Egypt. (9)And David smote the land, and left neither man nor woman alive, and took away the sheep, and the oxen, and the asses, and the camels, and the apparel, and returned, and came to Achish. (10)And Achish said, Whither have ye made a road to day? And David said, Against the south of Judah, and against the south of the Jerahmeelites, and against the south of the Kenites. (11)And David saved neither man nor woman alive, to bring tidings to Gath, saying, Lest they should tell on us, saying, So did David, and so will be his manner all the while he dwelleth in the country of the Philistines…

            In a nutshell, those 5 tribes which I underlined had giant DNA in their bloodlines.

            • The Philistines (I Samuel 7:14; split-tribe of the Amorites)
            • The Geshurites (Joshua 13:10-13; split-tribe of the Amorites)
            • The Amalekites (Numbers 13:28-28; 31-32) (Deut. 2:8; 10-12)
            • The Kenites (I Samuel 15:5-6; split-tribe of the Amalekites)
            • King Achish of Gath/Gittites (Joshua 11:22; remnant tribe of the Anakims)

            David and the nation of Israel were surrounded by them.

            And as for the significance of them all having giant DNA, Scripture further testifies that they all were not only false deity idol worshipers (Ex. 23:24,32-33) (Ex. 34:13-17) (Num. 33:52) (Deut. 7:5) (Josh. 24:15-16) — but they also performed all manner of abominable practice to their idols within their culture (Ex. 23:24) (Ex. 34:15) (Deut. 20:18).

            Such abominable practices included: incest, bestiality, and other manners of sexual perversion (Lev. 18:3,30), as well as sacrificing their live infants upon red-hot statues of Molech (Lev. 18:21) (II Kings 21:6,9)

            – – – – – – –

            Forgive me for this lengthy post Billiam, but I have done research into these tribes in Scripture — due to asking the same moral questions (that, perhaps, you and others have) as to why David, or other Israelites by God’s command, would slay these entire groups of men, women, and children.

          • Billiam201

            Yes, I see that you have done your research into Bronze Age fiction.

            That doesn’t change the fact that it is a work of fiction.

            A work of fiction that criminalizes harmless behavior, while condoning terrible actions as holy and righteous as long as you are raping women and killing babies because yahweh told you to.

            I’m amazed that, in all your “research” you didn’t manage to learn that GIANTS DONT EXIST, but I suppose that isn’t the point here. Then again, I don’t think you get to call it “research” if you only have 1 book, and you keep reading it over and over.

            Additionally, am I to assume that you have nothing else to say regarding the Bible’s tacit endorsement of rape as a tool? Because “it’s ok if I do it to the right people” isn’t exactly a defense.

          • Billiam, I’ve seen your other response to me on this thread and I intend to address that one over the course of our discussion, also. And additionally, on the topic of giants I have researched sources outside of the Bible…and have found more than a few interesting quotes.

            Take this one from “honest Abe” Abraham Lincoln, for instance:


            The Collected Works of Abraham Lincoln (1809-1869).

            [c. September 25-30, 1848]

            “…A philosopher of a slightly different turn will say Niagara Falls is only the lip of the basin out of which pours all the surplus water which rains down on two or three hundred thousand square miles of the earth’s surface. He will estim[ate with] approximate accuracy, that five hundred thousand [to]ns of water, falls with its full weight, a distance of a hundred feet each minute–thus exerting a force equal to the lifting of the same weight, through the same space, in the same time. And then the further reflection comes that this vast amount of water, constantly pouring down, is supplied by an equal amount constantly lifted up, by the sun; and still he says, ‘If this much is lifted up, for this one space of two or three hundred thousand square miles, and equal amount must be lifted for every other equal space; and he is overwhelmed in the contemplation of the vast power the sun is constantly exerting in quiet, noiseless operation of lifting water up to be rained down again.

            “But still there is more. It calls up the indefinite past. When Columbus first sought this continent–when Christ suffered on the cross–when Moses led Israel through the Red-Sea–nay, even, when Adam first came from the hand of his Maker–then as now, Niagara was roaring here. The eyes of that species of extinct giants, whose bones fill the mounds of America, have gazed on Niagara, as ours do now. Co[n]temporary with the whole race of men, and older than the first man, Niagara is strong, and fresh to-day as ten thousand years ago. The Mammoth and Mastadon–now so long dead, that fragments of their monstrous bones, alone testify, that they ever lived, have gazed on Niagara. In that long–long time, never still for a single moment. Never dried, never froze, never slept, never rested,”

            Noticed that quote I underlined where Lincoln said “whose bones fill the mounds of America“?

            The historical archives of the New York Times, alone, contains dozens of reports on archaeologists, or even regular people, digging up remains of giant skeletons.

            Here’s one reported find from 1868, at Sauk Rapids, MN:


            Summary: City quarrymen allegedly found the petrified remains of a giant human skeleton embedded within solid granite rock (with the remains, itself, further embedded within sand). The length of the skeleton was measured to be 10 feet 9 1/2 inches; with the skull measuring 31 1/2 inches in circumference, the femur 26 1/4 inches, etc. Estimated weight, when alive, was estimated to be 906 lbs. The petrified bones, themselves, reportedly weighed 304 1/4 lbs.

          • M

            Billiam201, in my humble experience you are far better off walking away from religious Bible memorization nuts like this one. Even if Jesus H Christ descended from the Heavens above tomorrow , I bet even Adam the Holy Sword Spirit would argue with Him!

            Maybe Adam could go full sacrificial Lamb and nail himself to a Cross, and even God himself would be compelled to tell Adam to chill the F*%k Out.

            No offense to Almighty God but I’ve always found this funny:

            Monty Python and the Holy Grail the blessing


          • Billiam201

            I generally don’t, but his assertion that the lack of Jesus is what’s wrong with the maweens is utterly laughable. As such, I will use it to amuse myself.