I’m curious to see what you all would do to fix this organization (other than disband it)?

As an NCO, my job is to enhance the effectiveness of the Marine Corps. However, I don’t see that happening when the following aren’t fixed:
1. Boot Camp (DIs and SDIs) needs to be able to weed people out more. I’m not talking about letting DIs abuse recruits. There are recruits who get through boot camp who has no business being a Marine. Some even want to drop out. Instead of discharging them and USMC decides to ‘punish’ them by recycling them, over and over, and over again even though it’s clear that they don’t want to be there. Guess what? You have to waste money and manpower going to a recruit or Marine that doesn’t want to be there and is gonna be liabilities later on. What are they? Well you see them mentioned here: buddy fuckers, they become bad leaders, incompetent Marines, mass punishments, etc. It doesn’t take much to see this compounds. Forcing them to go through by recycling isn’t doing anything. If you can’t handle 3 months of boot, what makes you think you can hack SOI, the operating forces or deployment? This is coming from my experiences and my conversation with a former Marine DI and recruiter. What kind of elite unit keeps undesirables who don’t even want to be in around? I do give some credit to some recruiters and Marines on RA who help poolees prepare for boot which contributed somewhat to lowering failure rates in boot camp.
2. Let Marines (active duty) choose their MOS- not just the field. I don’t get how the Marines generally wait until after boot camp to tell new Marines what their ‘exact’ MOS is and the reason for it is ‘the demands of the Marine Corps.’ This is an example of piss poor personnel management. While working Recruiters Assistance, I have seen several people turned away because they are not guaranteed to choose the exact MOS who had the potential to benefit the Marines.
3. Less advertisement. I swear I’m in an organization with attention whores. And you don’t even have to see the commercials (ie Katy Perry music video). If we are elite and cut down on the stupid BS by 25%, people will flock to join.

I’m curious to see what you all would do to fix this organization (other than disband it)?

Submitted by: dee dee dee

Fleet Marine Life #46 – Integrity Trap

2011-06-08-fleetmarinelife46 - Integrity Trap


One thing higher ups use on their lower downs is something that I like to call the “integrity trap.” This is a trick where higher ups get Marines to incriminate themselves. The higher ups want Marines to admit fault for some wrong doing (harmful or not) now as opposed to finding about it later. The problem with this is that the higher ups may lie or mislead Marines into incriminating themselves. For example:

Douchebag LT : Did you guys go out on liberty without signing the book?
Sgt : I’m going to tell you the truth. Yes, we did.
Douchebag LT : Then I want everyone called back. Tell them all to come back here, get in cammies and stand outside for formation within 2 hours.

True story. I was one of ones in the formation. I followed the rules but I was still punished.

When you do something wrong and you know that there’s no evidence against you then you CANNOT get in trouble. However some people believe the higher ups whenever they say shit like, “We know who did it. Come forward now or else you will be punished extremely.” Well, shit. If they know who did it then why ask? It’s because they don’t know who did it! They’re lying just like they’re lying about “looking out for you.” The higher ups want to cover their ass or maybe they have some sick fetish for getting people in trouble.

However some people don’t know all this and that’s where higher ups step in and guilt you into digging your own grave. They’ll remind you that you’re a Marine and Honor, Courage, Commitment and Marines never lie, cheat or steal (which is the biggest load of crap). And if that’s not enough, they’ll say that you’ll be hammered if you don’t tell the truth and they’ll find out. This may be true but remember, if there’s no evidence, you are free!

Let’s see what happens if that Sergeant didn’t fall for the Lieutenant’s integrity trap.

Douchebag LT : Did you guys go out on liberty without signing the book?
Sgt thinks for a second. If we went out on liberty without signing the book, how can he prove that we even went out at all?
Sgt : No.
Douchebag LT : If you’re lying, we will hammer you!
The Sgt knows that if he reverses his current answer, he will be hammered.
Sgt : I’m not lying.
Douchebag LT : I better not catch you lying to me.
Sgt : You won’t.

Everyone isn’t punished.

I had a PFC that came to the fleet. He was a PFC for the longest time. When I asked him why, he replied, “I got NJP’d for underage drinking.” I asked how he got caught and he replied, “Because I admitted it.” I asked if he could of gotten away with it and he said yes. But he told me that he was compelled to tell the truth as if his life and honor depended on it. The consequence was that he lost his rank, hundreds of dollars and respect. What did he do so wrong? Nothing serious. No one was hurt. Nothing was damaged.

The worst integrity traps that I’ve encountered happened while I was in Afghanistan. A buddy from my platoon was caught with a dead opium plant in his possession. He had to go to several meetings with officers who were to determine if he were to stay in the Marine Corps or not. When the officers asked him whether or not he did drugs, my buddy thought for a second and decided to tell the truth. He said yes. They asked what drugs. He said Ecstasy. When they said how many. He carefully answered one pill. The majority of the officers said that they had no evidence that he actually used drugs in the Marine Corps so they were about to let him go until one Douchebag Lieutenant decided to press things further. Because of that one Lieutenant, my buddy was given an other than honorable discharge a few months before he was about to get out of the Marine Corps.

He lost his GI Bill, his VA Benefits, his disability, everything. Everything taken away because of one sentence. He didn’t harm anyone except maybe himself. But had he lied, he would have been given an honorable discharge. No one would have been mad at him because he served honorably.

In conclusion, if your higher ups ask you if you did something wrong, and you could get away with it, just lie. They’re not there to help you. They’re there to cover their own asses. Telling the truth is not worth losing rank, respect and hundreds of dollars for something so minor.

On a side note, this website has passed 10,000 hits.

Falling into integrity traps since 1775.

Fleet Marine Life #45 – One Two Three

2011-06-03-fleetmarinelife45 - One Two Three


Marines aren’t exactly the brightest of people. Sometimes when I’m in a large crowd of Marines, I feel like I’m one of many sheep or lemmings because no one usually knows what the fuck is going on. So we all follow the senior staff NCO who in turn does not know what the fuck is going on but pretends he does.

Counting off is where the group leader needs to make sure he has all of his people so that they can go off to do something (most likely something shitty). It starts off by everyone getting in a box formation, then one Marine would start off by screaming ONE and then the Marine next to him would say TWO and the Marine next to him would yell THREE and so on. Sounds easy, right? Well apparently to Marines, it’s like trying to dismantle the Hadron Particle Collider.

It amuses me how someone could fuck up this simplest of tasks.

Fucking up counting from 1 to 60 since 1775.

Fleet Marine Life #44 – Suicide Brief

2011-06-01-fleetmarinelife44 - Suicide Brief


Suicides happen in the Marine Corps. What does the Marine Corps do to help prevent it? Powerpoint by death. Frankly, I fucking hate these briefs. It is an epic struggle to stay awake through it. On one presentation, I drank 3 monsters. And afterwards, I felt shittier physically and mentally.

For those higher ups who think that this is the solution, how about asking yourself why Marines commit suicide and then work from there? There are some problems that can’t be solved like, “I want to kill myself because the Marine Corps sucks ass and I have 3 years left on my contract.” Sure the Marine Corps sucks ass but as a higher up, I’m sure you can find ways to lessen that shitty feeling.

Like instead of keeping your Marines working beyond normal working hours because you had your head up your ass, why not improve yourself so that they don’t have to suffer because of YOUR mistakes. Or stop treating your Marines like shit because your vagina hurts or you have a fucking power trip. Your Marines are there to work for you and will do what you tell them to as long as they trust and believe you. The higher ups are supposed to be helping their junior Marines and not themselves but it almost always seems to be the opposite of that.

Getting a briefed on suicide awareness since 1775.

Fleet Marine Life #43 – Knock Knock

2011-05-27-fleetmarinelife43 - Knock Knock


One thing that I won’t miss about the Marine Corps is duty. Duty is when you have to get in uniform and sit behind a desk near your barracks for 24 hours. Your responsibilities are to make sure no one does anything stupid like throw beer bottles out their window and into the parking lot.

If I had duty, I always got stuck with a weekend duty. I felt as if the duty gods  cast a curse upon me especially when I got duty on my last week in the Marine Corps. It’s whatever.

Nothing bad usually happens during the weekdays. Usually you hear something about people breaking into Marines’ rooms for CIF gear or their Playstations. Even with duty present, no one ever gets caught but other than that, nothing normally happens. I believe duty is necessary during the weekends because that’s when Marines usually do dumb shit and I don’t think anyone would be sober enough during the weekend to call PMO or 911.

Nothing usually ever happened to me while I was on duty. The only incident that I can remember is when our platoon’s Shitbag Steve was drunk on a Friday and attacked the Duty NCO over something stupid. Then on the next day, everyone in my platoon was punished for it. Good times.

Anyways, I hated it when my unit fucks up the duty roster and then they go crazy to find someone for duty. It’s usually because the person that they assigned to duty isn’t available but they assigned him anyways. God damn disorganization.

Under my platoon’s level, there was an excel spreadsheet that had 30-something boxes (representing days of the month) next to everyone’s name. If someone was doing something on the 5th of that month, then the box under “5” would be filled with APT (Appointment) or DTY (Duty). Once everyone’s future tasks are filled out, you don’t have to ask everyone again for that month! If someone has to do duty in my platoon and the platoon leader isn’t sure if certain Marines are busy or not, he can check that spreadsheet that’s posted on the bulletin board. That way confusion is avoided and he doesn’t assign people who cannot do duty to duty. If you solve a problem but the same thing continues to reoccur every month, then you probably haven’t solved it at all.

Avoiding Duty since 1775.

Fleet Marine Life #42 – Suicide Watch

2011-05-26-fleetmarinelife42 - Suicide Watch


I thought suicide watch (aka shadow watch) was a waste of time. If someone wanted to commit suicide for real, he would just do it and not start running around saying how he’s going to do it. If someone in my unit said, “I’M GOING TO COMMIT SUICIDE,” fellow Marines would normally respond with, “No balls, small penis, spaghetti pubes.”

But in all seriousness, In 2008, the Marine Corps had the second highest suicide rate compared to the other parts of the Armed Forces. It came very close to first place.


After combat, it is one of the top killer of Marines. In 2009, 52 Marines killed themselves.


There is a simple explanation why Marines do it. The Marine Corps blows complete and total ass. There are many ways they do this and I can’t hope to possibly explain it all.

For one, you are a government slave bound to follow the ridiculous whims of your Officers and Staff NCOs. Some of these tasks will push Marines to borderline suicidal levels. For example, I knew a section that did nothing all morning and afternoon. Just before they were about to be released, their douchebag Warrant Officer would dump a shitload of “high priority” work on them. Of course none of this work was “high priority” and could have been done tomorrow. These Marines had no choice unless they want to lose money and rank.

One negative effect of this is that Marines would have to spend extra time beyond their normal working hours. What remains unseen are Marines not having time to see their families, their loved ones, have fun or even relax. It makes life more stressful.

There are several questions that I want to ask of that Warrant Officer. Why can’t they complete those turnover binders tomorrow and not that night? Why did you dump it on them at the last minute? Who is failing? This is just one example of things higher ups can do that can prevent thoughts of suicide.

A suicide brief is given everytime a Marine kills himself in my unit. Holy crap, they are boring. You sit on your ass for hours while there’s someone who talks on and on about suicide, ways people commit suicide, suicide success rates, why people commit suicide, the works. Is this really the solution?

Instead of asking themselves where do all these problems come from, higher ups just look for solutions. Never once in my Marine Corps career has anyone asked me if I would commit suicide and why.

If you’re thinking about suicide, do what I did. Say to yourself, “Just *insert number of years left in the Marines* more years left.”

On a side note, I added the USMC Hall of Fame section to the “A Few Good Links” section.

Watching shadows since 1775.

Fleet Marine Life #41 – Pullers and Pyles

2011-05-18-fleetmarinelife41 -  Pullers and Pyles


In the Marine Corps, you can work as hard as you want but you won’t really go anywhere. You’ll just end up getting more work. In fact, you will be so depended on, your higher ups won’t even let you go anywhere.

Why would your higher ups send you away and lose an asset? Officers and SNCOs wanted to make themselves look good at the expense of doing what is right. So instead of rewarding the good Marines, they would punish them by keeping them in their section.

This happened to a friend of mine named Dan. He was so squared-away, that he would single-handedly bring up his entire section because he did a significant amount of work. They never sent him anywhere but instead, they treated him like shit because they were big time haters.

So, he became sick of their bullshit and eventually turned 180 degrees toward the path of shitbaggery. His higher ups turned him into the platoon janitor. Eventually, they sent him away to the Philippines where he met a Master Gunnery Sergeant. They played golf together and hanged out. Then this conversation took place.

Dan : Hey, can you give me good pros and cons?
MGuns : Sure!
Dan : Thanks, I usually get crappy pros and cons for the work that I do.
MGuns : Who do you work for?
Dan : *tells him*
MGuns : Oh. I hate that faggot.

Throughout the Marine Corps, I have had my suspicions but this single event proved to me, without a shadow of doubt, that in order to succeed in the Marine Corps, you need to know the right people. So it doesn’t matter what you do but more importantly, it’s about who you know.

Unfortunately, the reward and punishment system is fucked up most of the times. I remember we had this Temporary Assigned Duty (TAD) to Las Vegas and they wanted to send this belligerent shitbag, who couldn’t even pass a PFT, just so that they could get rid of this shitbag but the shitbag couldn’t go. If you are in a position of leadership and are wondering if a place is shitty or not, just ask your platoon, “Who wants to go?” If at least one Marine says yes, it’s probably all right. If over half the platoon raises their hands, you know DAMN well to send THOSE volunteers.

Why do you want to send shitbags who don’t want to do anything when there are WILLING Marines? I don’t understand why the selection process has to be random. It’s not like the whole damn process should be so complicated. Just tell everyone to stand in a formation or gather around and start asking a bunch of questions to weed out undesirable Marines.

I worked hard and ended up getting sent to 29 Palms for a month. Another Marine gets caught beating off in the General Population Tent, a trailer, the head, on post and then got caught sleeping on post and ends up being sent to work at the Single Marine Program Area for half a year. My Sergeant asked my platoon, “Who wants to work at the SMP?” and 95% of the people raised their hands. BUT SPANKY GOT IT!

Is this the right way to go about doing business? Good Marines should be treated like limited resources and not something expendable. If the Marine Corps was a business, it wouldn’t even last a year because everyone would quit.

On a side note, I’ve added a few more links in the “A Few Good Links” section. Also, www.ihatetheUSMC.com added me on their links section. Thanks!

Working for work since 1775.

Fleet Marine Life #32 – Wingman

2011-04-27-fleetmarinelife32 - Wingman

One thing you don’t want to bring when you go out drinking is another Marine. God it’s terrible. A countless number of things can go wrong. It’s too many to list so I’ll turn them into comics in the future.

They had a bar in Okinawa, Japan named, “Globe and Anchor” but Marines called it the the Hook and Jab because so many stupid and drunk Marines fought each other there over something as stupid as the way another drunk Marine looks.

Drunk Marine 1 : I don’t like the way you’re just standing there!
Drunk Marine 2 : Them’s fightin’ words!
Drunk Marine 1 : Let’s fight!

Alcoholism is part of the Marine Corps tradition. And we suffer greatly because of it. A lot of Marines drink and drive 120 mph into the nearest tree. And then the Marines that are still alive in that command all receive a 3 hour long safety stand-down on “how not to drink and then drive your car 120 mph into the nearest tree.” Whenever I receive these briefs, it is a struggle to stay awake. I could have slept for 10 hours yesterday but it’s like some sort of dark magic that these speakers cast on all of us.

The best way to stay awake is by not paying attention. I’ll blankly stare ahead, with my mouth gaping open, and think about how much I want to get the fuck out of the Marine Corps and what I’m going to do out of it.

But why do Marines drink? They drink to escape the shitty reality that they are in. It’s escapism.

Driving into trees since 1775.


Fleet Marine Life #31 – Congrats

2011-04-26-fleetmarinelife31 - Congrats


I can pretty much imagine what everybody wants to do when they get out of the Marine Corps.

1. Get the fuck away from your current duty station.
2. Burn, sell or lock away your uniforms.
3. Grow out your hair/mustache/beard to your standards.
4. Get more tattoos to your standards.
5. Go to “previously restricted area/country” and do “previously restricted activity” for as long as you’d like or as long as your funds permit.

Those are the main things that I can imagine.

This cycle of Marine recruits coming in and angry Marines going out is continuous and it appears near ending but if the Marine Corps keeps spitting out angry former Marines, you sort of wonder if the higher ups even realize that this is a future problem.

The answer is, it is. If the higher ups took off their rose-colored glasses they would realize it. Eventually, with the Marine Corps being as shitty as it is, people will get out as fast as possible and spread bad word about the Marine Corps.

And this Angry Marine will spread bad word about the Marine Corps for the rest of his natural life.

Now imagine this with many, many angry Marines. The Marine Corps is taking its own dick and shoving it up its own ass by fucking over good Marines and making up stupid rules and regulations. Also, the higher ups that are currently in don’t care about us in general. They say they do but it’s just a bunch of lies and the people below them, the lower-downs, will believe them up until the point when something happens that changes their perspective of those higher ups. It’s usually by witnessing one or many wrong-doings.

I can go on but I will in later comics.

Flipping the bird at higher ups since 1779.

CivilianFirstClass USMC Advice – Prepare yourself for EAS NOW! Not later

Good morning, boys and girls! How the hell are we? You may be asking yourselves, “Who’s this douchebag and why does he sound so happy?” Well, I’ll tell you why. I recently separated from the Marine Corps with no ties with the organization (no IRR time left). This is going to be a bit long-winded so bear with me.

It was a bittersweet transition from being a man-baby who was coddled to a real adult. Before you motards start jumping on my back, I’ll ask you to think about it before you post. Marines aren’t allowed to take initiative or think for themselves. Ever hear “Good initiative, bad judgment” or “Who the hell told you to do that, Devil?!” Yeah, we’ve all been there. And that’s my point. Marines aren’t treated like adults, unless they’re SNCOs or officers. While in the Marine Corps everything is provided for you. You really didn’t have to worry about anything and money will be rolling in. Once you’re out you’ll have nothing but the things you work for. This is what I mean by bittersweet.

Well, I’ve been on this site a back and haven’t returned until now. Looks like there are a lot more
people since I last lurked through here. Which I think is great. Aside from the smoke pit, this is a wonderful medium for Marines to come and vent their anger and frustration. To the moderators/creators I say, keep up the great work. And to the Marines – come on here when you need to vent. Get it out of your system here and don’t lash out to those jerks around you (even though they may deserve it); don’t give them a reason to pick on you. Last time I was here, I replied to some troll that commented on the page. Looking through the anon boards, I don’t see too many trolls anymore. Although they are annoying, I do like it when they post. It’s fun to see Marines who’ve been mistreated or kept their anger bottled inside pounce on the troll. Because let’s face it, we couldn’t do that in real-life.

The main reason why I’m writing today is to try and impart some advice to Marines. The posts on
this board are loaded with sound advice so heed them. My advice is to milk the Marine Corps for all it’s worth. They’re going to get what they want from you so why not take what you can get? There are loads of things that can accomplish this without breaking the law. Tuition assistance is a MAJOR one. If you’re in right now, you’d be an idiot and not to take advantage of it. It’s free money. I can’t stress that enough. I started taking classes for three reasons: 1. Education 2. Milking the Marine Corps 3. Getting out of field day. I don’t mind cleaning my room because I’m a neat person by nature. But what I didn’t like was to clean after other Marines. Why should I clean the lounge if I don’t ever go in the lounge? Or clean the NCO deck if I’m not an NCO? So instead of getting black-out drunk, why not just take a class or two? It’ll make you’re time go by much faster and make you more marketable when you’re ready to transition.
Next thing you should do is go to medical to claim every ache and pain. I’m sure some of you have heard this before so just do it. If you have enough claims you may get money after you leave the service. This is simple and doesn’t take much time. And even if it does, it’ll get you out of work for a bit.

Lastly, my advice is to save money. This is very important especially if you are planning to get out. It’s never too early to start. A few hundred dollars a month will add up and will give you a good start when you’re out in the real world looking for a job. Or while you’re in school if you plan to go that route. With a good amount of savings to supplement your Post 9/11 GI Bill, you’ll be in a good position to start your new life semi-worry free. While you’re out, it’s amazing how much you have to pay for when you’re on your own and I just hope you’re properly prepared for it. It’s not easy but it sure is satisfying to know that you are on your own.

In no way am I saying you have listen to me because I’m a nobody, just a former cog in a huge machine which is the Marine Corps. But I genuinely do want Marines who gets out to succeed. On my way back to my home of record, I ran into a former Marine and started shooting the shit. He was bitter with his current situation and I asked what he did to prepare before he got out. I found out, he didn’t do much. He was so used to the security that the military provided that he didn’t properly prepare. I don’t want to be in the same situation and I don’t want to see you guys there either. So please prepare yourselves because it’ll make a world of difference once you’re out.

Nothing feels better than leaving with your DD214, Navy Comm (worthless in the real world), and a check for the leave days I sold back while driving off base for the last time. The feeling is invigorating and liberating. It’s the next chapter of your life so make sure that it’s going to be a
good one by doing what you need to do now. Don’t wait for later to get your shit together. Do it now.

A little about myself: I am a former NCO and was just an average Marine. I got out a few months
ago and now living a normal life. I didn’t do anything special while in the Marine Corps but I didn’t manage to get an associate’s degree (I wish I would’ve started right away so I would’ve gotten a bachelors). I am working for the government (not DoD) and planning to finish my schooling.

Again, I wish all of you the best of luck. I know your EAS seems like forever away but make the time in between count and do something meaningful that’ll prepare you for the real world. It’s going to be worth it in the end.

Submitted by: CivilianFirstClass

Fleet Marine Life #28 – Twenty

2011-04-23-fleetmarinelife28 - Twenty

Whenever I lend Marines a twenty or $40 or whatever, they ask nicely and I expect them to pay me back seeing how we all get guaranteed government paychecks every 1st and 15th of every month. Unfortunately, this is not the case.

Usually the Marine is someone from my unit and they’ll ask for a small amount of money because “they forgot their wallet” or some shit and they’ll pay me back tomorrow or the next payday. The conversation typically goes like this:

Marine : Hey, man! I left my wallet back at the barracks. Silly, me. I was wondering if you could spot me a twenty.
K : Umm… Sure… Just get me back soon.
Marine : Sure, man! Thanks, I’ll get you back.

And then on the next day or next payday the conversation usually goes like this:

K : Hey, you got my money?
Marine : Yeah, here you go.
K : Thanks.
Marine : No, thank you!
K : No problem, man.

I’m just kidding, it never goes like that. Normally, it goes something like this:

K : Hey, you got my money?
Marine : What the hell, K? I don’t have “insert excuse here”! “Insert curse word”! Look. I’ll get you back on the next payday! Stop being a fucking dick, you “insert combination of curse words.” GOD!

The Marine I lent money to usually treats me like I owe him money! Either like that or like I’m the devil himself coming to collect his soul!

Normally this goes on until I bug them enough which is a pain in the ass. I try to help Marines out but it usually backfires horribly. If you’re going to loan another Marine money, get collateral. There is no reason you should be borrowing money with guaranteed government pay checks. Chances are that Marine hasn’t watched the “Don’t spend money you don’t have” video.

Lending other Marines money since 1775.

– K


Fleet Marine Life #23 – Beer Goggles

2011-04-18-fleetmarinelife23 - Beer Goggles

One thing I hate about Marines is that they get drunk as fuck and then they fuck shit up. In Okinawa, all the drunk Marines that live in the Barracks end up fucking everything up. If you had a nice poster on your door or a room number placard, that shit would be destroyed on the weekend. There’s like 30 room number 3s in my barracks. Like, seriously?

Once Marines break something, they’re not going to remember or care. I mean, that’s pretty fucked up. I had a bicycle outside my door and the button used to change gears is fucked up. Thank you, you drunk bastards.

I hate it when drunk Marines just end up fucking up the barracks. There is no limit to how much they piss me off. Drunk Marines fuck shit up and the good Marines end up cleaning that broken glass bottle in the parking lot or the 100 beer cans on the front lawn of the barracks or the puke on the sidewalk and the list goes on. Shit pisses me off.

I at least have the common decency to fuck my own shit up when I’m drunk.

Also, I found this picture while I was Google searching “Urinal”.

Getting drunk and fucking shit up since 1775.

– K


Fleet Marine Life #20 – Last Night

I’ve heard this type of story many times in many safety briefs.

Gunny Warhero would tell us stuff like, “Females! Don’t go out with the male Marines. They will fuck anything with a heartbeat! Hell, it doesn’t even need a heartbeat!” Then he would look at the Male Marines and say, “Male Marines! You may go out of town and there might be an old guy who says that he likes the Marines and offers to buy you a drink. He is going to get you so fucked up that the next thing you know you’re being fucked in the ass by a 70 year old man in a spiderman costume and that shit is all over the internet! YOU LAUGH NOW BUT THAT SHIT HAPPENED LAST WEEK!!!”

Another gunny would always tell us, “If she’s willing to go home with you then she’s willing to go home with anybody. Especially you Boostamount, you ugly ass motherfucker! Did everyone know he’s married? Who’d marry you? Fuck! I sure as hell wouldn’t.” And that’s true. To some heartless bitches, Marines are guaranteed paychecks, free healthcare, free housing, etc. They will marry Marines just to divorce them, take half their shit and then look for another Marine to start another cycle. Mother fucking black widow spiders are everywhere so beware.

Get fucked in the ass (literally) since 1775.


Fleet Marine Life #18 – Flaunt It


Well, that plan used to be a good way to get out the Marine Corps.

In my time, I’ve heard of two male Marines caught in the same bed in their school house. They got discharged right quick… out of the military. Sicko.

Are gay people bad in the military? Well, fuck! Half our females are fuckin’ lesbians! Do I care? Not really, I could care less. And the males? Someone told me that the Marine Corps is, “The longest 4 year long gay joke.” You’ll always see some Marine doing some border-line ambiguously homosexual shit but you’ll never see that same Marine actually do anything that’s straight up homosexual. Everyone acts gay but no one is gay.

This happens in every unit I have worked with. It’s really weird. Maybe it’s something in the base water.

I would talk about the story of the “Phantom Cocksucker,” but it would probably scare a lot of you ship dwelling folk.

Being lesbian since 1775.


Are You a Blacksheep Too?

I served in the MC for 4 years, during that time I was assigned to a CPAC as an 0121 – I was assigned a goddamned cubicle… “fine” I says. “I’ll just work my ass off and someone will notice that I belong somewhere else”. One day my time to shine came – there needed to be audits done, pay rectified, incentives calculated, awards typed and payments disbursed. I took care of all of that shit with one other Marine overnight. OVER-FUCKING-NIGHT. So I received a NAM – that’s right a Navy and Marine Corps Achievement Medal. Jealousy and general hatred was exhibited by all in the CPAC. God forbid that anyone be rewarded for their hard work and dedication. I guess I should have just went to the barracks and fucked off the night drinking beer and what-have-you instead of taking care of the things that are most important to Marines that are on the front lines like their leave, awards and especially PAY.

So like all other shops in the Corps, where one Devil Dog gets the pat on the back deservedly enough, the rest turn that Marine into the black sheep. The black sheep is now given extra duties like going to Squadron and Shop to conduct audits all by himself. One Colonel sees the true grit and determination of this black sheep and makes a change. He makes this one Marine the liason between the CPAC and the MAG. Meaning that I took the bullshit before it hit the fan.

Where CPAC would fuck you out of days, weeks and even months of pay – I would hold you back. I would make the change seem so fucking minimal that you never knew that they were taking the pay back. They’re the ones that overpaid you right? Fuck them.

You rate an award but your gunny says no? Fuck your gunny I run it anyways and when your gunny comes to complain I tell the SgtMaj. That’s how I roll.

You’ve got leave and you want to use it? Check. Go on leave. Enjoy yourself. When you get back I’ll only charge your leave balance half of what you actually took. Maybe less if I feel good that day.

Can’t get out of your shitty lease? I’ve got you covered. You’re going TAD next week for 5 days but hey! you’re out of your lease.

When it came to standing duty, I would stand duty for Marines on holidays; Christmas? check, Thanksgiving 96? Check. I did it all. Go have your fun Marines! Terminal Lance has this shit.

Who’s assigned to transporting prisoners? Marines? I’ll fucking do it – and I’ll treat them like human-fucking-beings too!

Taking Marines to the hospital a state away? I’ll drive them – and I’ll do it so fucking fast that they’ll have the rest of the day to just fuck about.

Got into a car crash somewhere in Mexico and now you’re scared that the unit will find out and NJP the shit out of both of you because you deploy in 2 days? I’ve got you covered. I pick you up myself and take you to a city hospital where you’re checked out- no harm no foul.

This system is put in place as a control, it runs like a business, they don’t care what you have done.

They don’t care that your cheating bitch of a wife left you and your kids the day you came back from a 18 month deployment after depleting your accounts and maxing out your credit cards with some asshole.

They don’t care that you won’t be able to pay your bills on time.
They don’t care that your shit will be repo-ed.
They don’t care that your credit will be fucked.
They don’t care what you did in Iraq or Afghanistan.
They don’t care that you are missing that leg or other appendage.
They don’t care that you’re missing friends.
They don’t give two-shits that Marines have died.All they care about is the bottom line. Having the system working.They take awards and leave days away that they accidentally gave you.They do it without wondering how it will affect you. Well for 3 years I abused the system through every loophole and Maradmin that I could.
However shady, it was legal enough. I knew my shit better than most.
I was under constant attack from the CO and XO. Constant attack from the CPAC.But I had a SgtMaj and a 1stSgt that knew I did it for one reason and one reason only;I did it for the Marines.

Submitted by: Sergemeister

Some of the dumbest people I’ve ever known are Marines

My advise to everyone here thinking about going into the Marine Corps……..DONT!  Join the Army or the Air Force.  I’ve learned in my years in the Corps that most leaders are all about them selfs, not about the Corps.  They may use the Corps as an excuse as to why they do a lot of the stupid things they do; but the fact is that most leadership, mostly SNCO’s and maybe a few officers care more about them selfs than anything else.

Some of the dumbest people I’ve ever known are Marines.  And what’s worse is that all of these MOTARDS lead Marines.  I work with one right now who is about the dumbest SNCO I’ve ever seen in my life. He’s all ego and very little common sense.  I work with another one who has no initive.  These are the kind of people that are getting promoted even with bad paper work on them.  If you have a good PFT/CFT, done some PME that no one really does any way and look sexy in your promotion picture, you will get promoted.  I’ve known some terds that have made rank that way.  This is because the promotion boards are selecting people for too much of the wrong reasons.

Submitted by: FRUSTRATED!

The EAS Song

No doubt many of you have seen this clip, which I believe is recognized as a fitting homage for many thousands of discharged Marines. I’ve been out for about 5 years now, but when this character sings, “. . . and last of all we got one more left it’s the most important one, it’s the EAS . . .” I think of the relief I felt while driving out the front gate with my DD-214. It was almost euphoric. The lyrics are so simple, the song a concise encapsulation of his time in the Corps. There is bullshit everywhere and acronyms for everything. And hiding beneath the veneer of this highly lofted institution are the symptoms of confusion and mediocrity: on-duty Marines sleeping, favoritism, politics, avoiding responsibility, etc. Keep in mind, this young man is not singing about your local mechanic in coveralls finishing a beer when he should be repairing your car- he’s talking about the United States Marine Corps. As always, I am excluding those combat-tested Marines and the ones who have paid the ultimate price. The rest of you (including me) deserve no special recognition for just doing our jobs.

Motivators love to say, “Well there’s always a share of both love and hate for the Corps.” Just what part of, “Fuck USMC you can suck my cock” in that song conveys love for the Marine Corps? I personally reserve those sentiments for organizations (and the people in them) for which I harbor no affection. You can even tell your girlfriend, “Fuck you” in an argument, as well as “You can suck my cock” in a different setting when both of you are feeling decadent. But you cannot tell your girlfriend, “Fuck you, you can suck my cock.” She just won’t do it. It’s your way of saying, “I think we’re done” in the most undiplomatic way. But I don’t hate the Marine Corps. I won’t waste my time and energy hating it. My relationship with the USMC is a lot like the estrangement you have for that ex-lover who just isn’t right in the head. You pity and sometimes humor her, you know she (or he, for you ladies) is insane, and you can’t help her. And no matter how many times you explain that her negative traits far outweigh her good ones, she’s still going to believe that she made your life richer and more worthwhile. That’s the fallacy many motivators believe, that somewhere in one of the chambers of our hearts we still love and miss the Corps. So you just have to laugh, shake your head, and stay away. Hate is not healthy. I personally prefer expressing my awe and amazement toward these delusions of grandeur, followed by amusement.

When you compare the happiness level of your graduation from boot camp to your EAS, you will find that the former is grounded upon a belief system that had no or little substance in the first place. And little by little, you learn that the EGAs woven into your uniforms and pinned to your collars take on a different meaning than when you first coveted them. In the beginning, they were symbolic of being the ultimate badass and the consummate professional. But over time, the environment and the resources at your disposal began to reflect the inadequacy of the training protocol and superficial aesthetic of the Corps. Shall I quote Tyler Durden? “Sticking feathers up your butt does not make you a chicken.” Likewise strutting, yelling and marching in formation does not make you formidable, tougher, or organized. It only makes you more obedient and susceptible to further indoctrination.  Ultimately, your graduation from basic training pales in comparison to your EAS celebration. This is the case 9 times out of 10.

Perhaps a Marine and/or poolee (those naive, sorry bastards) will argue that if the USMC mentality failed to take hold, we just “didn’t do it right.” Something went awry. We weren’t Marine material. But being Marine material isn’t prestigious at all. The necessary components for being one are really reduced to two main factors: 1. a healthy body (which isn’t at all reflective of your character), and 2. the willingness to obey (like a child). Anything beyond that is derived from the individual. So this whole misconception that Marines somehow acquire admirable abilities and traits that are otherwise inherent is one of the biggest crocks perpetuating the Marine Corps myth.

If you’re one of those people who knows that had it not been for the Corps, you would’ve been incarcerated, committing felonies and/or just been an overall ineffectual human being, you’re among that alarmingly growing percentage who truly needs such draconian levels of discipline just to function. The Corps has attempted unsuccessfully to correlate the word “discipline” with the words “practical, useful, and efficient.” In other words, a Marine’s ability to do the right thing, to just be DECENT, requires drug tests, structured exercise sessions, and accountability formations to keep him that way. The definition for excellence in the Marine Corps is synonymous with maintaining the status quo in the private sector. Talk about lowering the bar. Those civilians and [few] Marines that have reached or transcended the standards of excellence do so individually, simply because USMC policy is designed as a blueprint for ordinariness. So without equivocation, there are far more excellent people in the civilian world than there ever were in the Corps. Hands down. No question about it. Aside from them being able to run for long periods of time, Marines work very hard in order to become very average.

– PerfectScapegoat


How a Marines Ego Works

NINJA_PUNCH – I just got done watching the move “Revolver” if you haven’t seen it I would highly recommend it (You can watch the full film here: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zPNnu7QPtz8&wide=1 ). I’m not here to write a movie review, but I feel this applies. In the movie, a couple of people (who remain unnamed until the end) believe they’ve discovered the formula for the perfect con. Their student, Jake Green (Played by Jason Statham) Explains the formula as follows:

“The formula has infinite depth in its efficacy and application, but it is staggeringly simple and completely consistent. Rule one of any game or con, you can only get smarter by playing a smarter opponent. Rule number two: The more sophisticated the game, the more sophisticated the opponent.
If the opponent is very good, he will place his victim inside an environment he can control. The bigger the environment, the easier the control. He’ll toss the dog a bone, find their weakness, give them just a little of what they think they want. So the opponent simply distracts their victim by getting them consumed with their own consumption… The bigger the trick and older the trick, the easier it is to pull, based on two principles: They think it can’t be that old, or they think it can’t be that big for so many people to have fallen for it.

Eventually, when the opponent is challenged or questioned, it means the victim’s investment, and thus his
intelligence, is questioned. No one can accept that. Not even to themselves.” ~ Jake Green

Does anyone else think that the “opponent” sounds a lot like the marine corps and the “victim” sounds a lot like the marine? I sure think it does.

PerfectScapegoat Responds –
Revolver is one of my favorite movies, Ninja. That was a great post.

Another main theme the movie focuses on is the conceptualized self, the ego. They call the ego an agency of literalism because the mind doesn’t want to accept a concept that is too difficult to grasp- it will naturally choose a path of least resistance in order to satisfy the pride within the individual. The ego is incapable of correlating price with product, and it conveniently separates the two while we hang ourselves with the rope given us.Towards the end of the flick, Jake realizes that he suffers from a syndrome that most of us (especially Marines) succumb to at one point or another- we’re approval junkies.  As an added caveat, the Corps loves to emphasize the self-importance of urgency: “go here, go there, be there at this time OR ELSE, look important, carry yourself in a manner that suggests that you’re saving the world, etc.” But on pretty much any given day, what is really accomplished with such gravity and fabricated surliness? In exchange for their obedience, they’re given the illusion of importance.

Given enough distractions and false hopes, a Marine can spend 20 years in an organization that has only given him the illusion of accomplishment. I especially like the end of the movie when Jake takes away Ray Liota’s incentive for wanting to kill him, especially after the damage is already done. So Ray Liota is not only financially broke, but his power base has been completely toppled on a psychological level. The parallel here is that I don’t claim the USMC did anything for me, and when I have to mention my past I only say “the military.” I don’t specify. I give the Corps as little credit as possible, which is commensurate for its performance.

I think most former Marines think they have some kind of obligation to pay homage to the Corps, or they want people to swoon whenever they hear they were a Marine. This is leverage the USMC just loves to employ against them because they already invested so much into it. To turn their back on the USMC means you would have to develop their own identity instead of it giving them one with its own serial number. Most people just want to bask in the reputation, even if it’s undeserved. I know a guy who’s been out for 15 years, and he still uses Marine Corps jargon. It’s not my job to “reach” him- he’s lost forever. But I do take it upon myself to downplay my USMC experience because I want to be honest with them and myself.  What bothers the USMC (and I believe this wholeheartedly) is the idea of scores of former Marines disowning their parent organization and treating the experience like it was more like a bad acid trip instead of a patriotic rite of passage. At best (which is usually my take on it, since I’m a fairly optimistic guy), it was just a job. No more. No less.

Eat the Apple Fuck the Corps 235 Years of Murder Don’t Wish Me a Happy Birthday

Written by PunkJohnnyCash on Nov 10, 2010

Eat the Apple Fuck the Corps – A phrase used by Marines to express their displeasure with the Marine Corps. Usually mouthed by someone about to leave the Corps or by a Marine who has endured a perceived injustice.

Today marks 235 years of legalized murder by one of the most deadly gangs on the earth. I was once a part of this gang. I am not proud of the death across the world. I am not proud that other young women and men were brainwashed into glorifying the murder of the state. On this 235th birthday of the Marine Corps I ask of you not to tell me happy birthday. Don’t thank me. Question the violence and slaughter.

Every year around November 10th I hear many people wishing me a “Happy Birthday” because it is the day the Corps celebrates it’s birthday. Today is the 235th year of the Marine Corps.  I also often get the redundant ‘thank you for your service’ from many who feel that the murderous actions of the state are honorable.

This is the time of year they throw elegant balls to celebrate. It is a big holiday in the Corps. Many from military families and those that have been involved in the U.S.M.C. know that today is a day of significance and a day that all Marines are not only aware of but often anticipating. There will be feasts, balls, drink and celebration this week all throughout the world.

I often do not know what to say as people find out I am a veteran of the U.S.M.C. and they thank me. I find the legacy of violence and brutality repulsive. I do not want to hear your thank you. I do not want to hear the ‘happy birthday’.

If you want to thank anyone thank the Winter soldiers for doing what is right. They are the true patriots. Celebrate those who speak out against the murder and violence of the American Empire. I will not be always faithful to the murder of the state. I will not condone sending young people to die and kill. The youth of the nation has been brainwashed into believing in the murder and tyranny of the state as I illustrated earlier in my article Fear and Loathing in the U.S.M.C. Brainwashed in the Corps.

Eat the Apple Fuck The Corps

Source: www.gonzotimes.com


Finish your time and get out

All you can do is do your time and get the hell out. I totally agree with what you say. SNCO’s mostly care for themselves. Im sure once upon a time when they were junior marines they told themselves they would never treat their marines the way they were treated. Bottom line once you pick up staff your work ethics and overall knowledge of what it is to be a socially acceptable considerate supervisor drastically decreases to the point of openly embarrasing their marines and doing paperwork on them for the same shit they did once before. I am a reservist. I have deployed several times. I can tell you this. Doing your one time enlistment and getting out before you make a huge mistake and re-up is the best chance that you have at making it in the real world. Think about it. You stay in..you pick up ssgt..then gy..then all the way up the ranks you go. Then you retire. For the last decade or so your avg work day has consisted of you sitting on your ass playing on fb and talking old corps antics to the guy next to you who is most likely only listening because he thinks that by doing so he has a better chance at getting that next rank which is probably true. Then you embark on your civilian life finally..where you now must try and fathom that if you call your co-worker a fat ass or a fucking retard you will likely be terminated. Not to mention..like I said..for the past decade you have been sitting on your ass barking orders that make absolutely no sense whatsoever. Therfore when you are approached by a 24 year old boss man who ask’s you to perform a simple task you then automatically assume that you must be given respect for being a retired lazy SNCO. I could go on and on. Bottom line..get out..go to college. Then look back on your 4 or 6 years in the shittiest branch of service and go yeah I use to be a retard. But now I have a degree..I am ethically and morally strong. The end.


Submitted By: MrJellyBeanMan

I always thought the Marine Corp was about Brotherhood

I always thought the Marine Corp was about Brotherhood until I realized then when I got caught for underage drinking. I had a few beers with another Marine who i just met when he got sick i helped him out , and got him back to his room, when duty realized i was underage. SgtMaj. tried to go Drill Instructor (obviously because he didn’t put out when he was a D.I.) and interrogate us asking who got the beer. I didn’t say anything, but the marine who got sick spilled everything. Not  only am I getting an NJP, I got ratted out by some bitch. Then I realized how much of a buddy fucker the Marine Corp is( at least nowadays) I understand I fucked up, but no Marine should snitch on another Marine. I hate hearing how the Marine Corp was back then. It is funny how we apparently fight for freedom, but don’t have any ourselves. I don’t Hate the Marine Corp I hate the fact that any little prick who has a little rank will use it, the fact that in the real world if some guy or girl was older than you and told you hey you are fucked up or don’t do that you can say FUCK YOU. I realized that alot of people who spend there entire time in the Corp will have a reality check when they get out.

The Perfect Scapegoat

To Semper Huh and ExMotard, I and most likely many others appreciate your candor. I’ve been out for four years now, and still remember my “epiphany.” I realized after about the two-year mark that greatness comes from within and the Corps, quite simply, was a monstrous impediment to my social, mental, emotional, and intellectual health. While this may seem melodramatic, consider the alternative: relying on another person or institution to extract virtues that already exist isn’t always successful.

Don’t get me wrong- tutoring, mentoring, and instruction are great things. But the institutional logic that exists within the Corps reinforces the identity of the Marine without truly making him better. Unless you were some kind of social reject, orphan, or juvenile delinquent, the Corps can’t offer much with regard to basic life skills. The training is rudimentary, while the drudgery of what I call the “existential upkeep” that Marines are expected to do is just too much for a normal, well-adjusted person to accept. I also noticed that the reason the USMC fosters such a zealous atmosphere is because its morale hangs by a thread on a daily basis. Incessant talks about motivation aren’t necessary if a unit is already motivated. It’s also important to note that Marine officers live very different lives from the enlisted. I would venture to say that the observations made on this site would come as quite a surprise to officers. I don’t blame officers for feeling this way, and I’m sure most of the hostility enlisted Marines have for them stems from plain, good old-fashioned envy. Hate them all you want, but officers were smart enough not to enlist. They get better pay, more freedom, and have more resources and training invested into them.

Now for the good news. I used to be a bit embarrassed to say I was a Marine, and it’s not because I failed at it. If anything, it failed me. I did a 4 year contract, served a year in Iraq, earned my Bachelors while I was in, and honorably discharged as a Sgt.  But I am fairly nonchalant about my service. It’s really no big deal because civilians work hard every day and don’t expect to be adored just for wiping their asses. And now that I’m out, I wouldn’t discourage someone from joining as long as they understood that they themselves are responsible for their own contract, conduct and decisions. If they know there is NOTHING in the world they can do to change the madness, they may come out of it okay. I’m still reaping the VA and GI Bill benefits, so it was a good decision for me. But I have serious doubts about the mental stability, moral grounding and competence of enlisted lifers. They aren’t bad people. They’re just a product of their environment.

Most Marines are basically “tourists”. They stroll around base for 3 1/2 years just to get a feel for the military culture. So I recommend that if you join the Corps, you do so within the context of a bizarre sociological experiment. I entered boot camp with a very serious and solemn tone because I really wanted to improve myself and excel. But I left the front gates at Lejeune laughing my ass off because everything I did in the Corps I could have done on my own. Tourists have the luxury of grabbing the proverbial bag of popcorn and just watching the show. I didn’t do that, unfortunately. I believed that the Corps would eventually deliver on its pledge to cultivating me into a better person. It never did. I recommend young people to just mind their own business and do their time if they’re a tourist. Employers don’t care that I was a Sgt, so I could’ve remained a LCPL and had a much better time. While I still ridiculed my superiors and mocked them, there was always this lingering responsibility I had that never went away. I think what drives Marines to promote in their first contract is vanity. No one remembers my name from 4 years ago and no one cares.

In other words, I was bought cheap.  LCPL is the best enlisted rank that offers the least amount of effort for the most return. You get to laugh at the debacles, poor leadership and stupidity, and if something goes wrong it’s not your fault. The second-best rank is SGT. Being a Corporal kind of blows.

A lot of people join the Corps for the bragging rights, which I think is just selling out to its undeserved reputation. So they leave the Corps with greater confidence and conveniently “forget” that they’re leaving because it’s overrated. If it wasn’t, they would still be Marines. Plus, that EGA tattoo isn’t coming off for a while, so they might as well just shine it on. But the lifers are dead serious about their profession, or at least they should be if they want to keep their careers. I’ve found that an enlisted lifer working on his career is like a toddler playing with his toys; both take their respective activities very seriously and believe that what they’re doing at that moment is the most important thing in the world. Take away his toys (or for the Marine, threaten his career or credibility), and all hell breaks loose. But at the end of the day, not a lot is accomplished. And then they get up the next day and do it all over again. They don’t see the futility of it all, but it gives them something to do and have been made to believe they are important. While I’ve heard tons of people talk about how awful the life of LCPLs and below are, I believe that enlisted lifers are the most miserable and disillusioned bastards in the USMC. Those who aren’t discouraged are blissfully ignorant. They believed with every beat of their hearts that one day they would be able to rise above the turmoil and struggle of the Corps, but it’s an anti-climactic “victory.” Every job has a changeover in bullshit with regard to promotions; but the USMC’s bullshit is epically infuriating for a sane individual.  Even if they promote to E9, lifers spend over 15 years getting to it just so they can drive a desk and watch LCPLs clean out their trash. I believe that it’s not worth it. There is no light at the end of the tunnel until you EAS.  I do believe in worthy careers, though- I’m pursuing mine. So the point is not that we should all just give up and live in some kind of fatalistic world where nothing has any purpose. Quite the contrary. It’s that we need to determine what we’ll get out of an organization before throwing ourselves into it.

Some may argue that I’m just being hateful. It’s not that at all. It’s that once a lifer retires, he has little or no career prospects. His legacy is being a Marine, and little else. While there are exceptions to this, enlisted retirees are generally relegated to working for the electric company, driving a taxi, pool cleaning company or short order cook. Tell me, why would I want to do this?  Their best years are behind them. It’s kind of like a protracted reign similar to the glory days of high school. And once it’s over, he’s discarded into the private sector. Most don’t have a college degree, and many are shuffled around to shops different from their MOS. Enlisted lifers are usually glorified supervisors who have lost their job skills. I’m just being truthful. A handful become GS workers and are able to make gobs of money, but there are only so many slots available. To put it mildly, enlisted lifers got on the wrong career track and are stuck with having to watch officers move on to achieve bigger and better things. That’s just the way it is.

I don’t think all enlisted lifers are lazy. I think they’re burdened with an SOP that has been 2 steps forward and 1 step back for too long, and it’s designed that way to keep the animals occupied. In Iraq, my unit was a MACHINE. Nearly everything went smoothly, and when obstacles appeared, they disappeared with innovation and teamwork because there was a real mission at stake. But the very moment I stepped back on CONUS soil, the silly and infuriating games began. You can only imagine my anger. It was like, “Shit, I’m back. I could’ve just remained on deployment for the rest of my contract.” So I got off the USMC treadmill because an inefficient template for policy, regulations and the overall mission results in protracted success (if any at all). It was just more of the same, regardless of the unit.

The bulk of tourists EAS because they know there is something fundamentally wrong with it. The word I used in the first paragraph is “normal,” and I used that term deliberately. If even half of the enlisted lifers I saw were in their right minds, that would be a very generous concession. But to remain and embrace such a dysfunctional environment requires a bit of insanity and/or desperation. And I’m not talking about the “Ha ha, Marines are so zany and wild with their silly and fun antics.” Instead, I saw serious indications of obsessive compulsives, narcissists, manic depressives and co-dependents. Don’t forget the sadists. Their environment is driving them insane. There is no way on this planet that the Marine Corps environment can pass as “normal.”

I realize that many a motivator might want to respond to this last assertion by defending the chaos of the Marine Corps as a prerequisite for sound training and mental preparation in combat. That’s a very creative rationale, but I call bullshit on it: smelly, sanctimonious, and self-deluding bullshit. On paper, Marines ply their trade and hone their craft with training, but that doesn’t happen in reality. Instead, it is the image of the Marine Corps that is
polished and maintained for the public to observe, and that requires time-consuming formalities that ultimately precludes additional mission-oriented training. The result is that every Marine that goes home for leave is a walking advertisement for the USMC, and each one that discharges is expected to live by the pledge of “Once a Marine, Always a Marine.” Allow me to call that last adage what for it is: a cheap form of guilt inducement designed to keep you from criticizing the Corps. What other military organization focuses its theme on permanent (though unofficial) membership? None that I can think of.

SNCOs aren’t entirely stupid. They know who is going to stick around and who isn’t, and they give preferential treatment to the motivators (even if their performance is woefully lacking). The moment they discover you’re getting out, you’ve been blacklisted. The only thing that virtually  guarantees that you’ll be taken care of in the USMC is whether or not you’re “in.” “Are you in, or are you out? That is the million dollar question. Are you going to make a career out of this, or not? If so, then welcome to the brotherhood. If you get a DUI, we’ll do our best to suppress it because we don’t want to ruin your career. But if you’re not in, well you can just bugger off and die (but not until we freeze your pay and demote you). Semper Fi, Devil Dog. Semper Fi.”

Thank you for reading, I know it was lengthy.

1st Sgt of Marines Leads Marines by Sleeping on Combat Patrol

first sergeant bernard jackson, sergeant major bernard jackson

1st Sgt of Marines, Bernard Jackson Leading his marines by sleeping on a combat patrol. Bravo Battery 1/11 – Iraq – 2007

In March 2006, Sergeant Major Jackson reported to 1st Battalion, 11th Marine Regiment, where he was assigned as the Bravo Battery First Sergeant. While assigned to Bravo Battery, Sergeant Major Jackson served in combat operations with 3d Battalion, 1st Marines, 13th Marine Expeditionary Unit (Special Operations Capable) in Operation Iraqi Freedom 6-8.



Awesome Vet’s Message to a Master Guns

This was written by K (Owner of www.FleetMarineLife.com) in response to a post a Master Guns wrote trolling on my website.  Thanks K.


MGuns, I just want to say that I will never ever re-enlist in the Marine Corps even if my life depended on it. The Marine Corps is the most inefficient, disorganized, unnecessary, bureaucratic organization run by a bunch of self-serving, arrogant, masochist, egotistical, hypocritical, retarded, ignorant, racist, power-hungry fascist assholes such as yourself. As a free man, I wake up everyday knowing that I’m not oppressed by someone who is so insecure about themselves that they have a need to fill some sick masochist urge to belittle, insult, degrade and even dehumanize those that they were sworn to serve. As a Staff NCO, you should know better than to use your own junior Marines purely for your own self gratification.

Now, you are here on a website created by the hatred of a former Marine who was used, abused and misused. His hatred and disgust of the current state of the Marine Corps was so deep and so vast that he was compelled to create a website venting his anger toward the organization which he once admired so much that he would give his life for it.

Now, you are here insulting us and calling us “whiners” and “pussies.” To be honest, you’re probably one of those Staff NCOs that don’t know what he’s doing. The kind that has never deployed but instead would rather work the system so that he’s in the rear doing the easy shit, out of harm’s way and in the comfort of the amenities of America. The kind that would yell at his juniors when asked a simple question for fear of revealing to them that he is incompetent. The kind that would put himself and his buddies first than his junior Marines. The kind that would punish his junior Marines because a good job wasn’t a good job because you didn’t get an award. The kind that would hold down good Marines just because you felt like it. The kind that would sleep with his junior Marines just because you could. The kind that would bow down to the insane orders of his superiors. The kind that would keep doing the wrong thing over and over again with the belief that you’re right. The kind who runs a “paper” PFT because passing a PFT is beyond one’s grasp. The kind who is overweight yet feels that he is in the right to correct other fat Marines.

Your “dedication of the mission” probably consists of you sitting on your ass all day, watching television in your office, going on youtube while you bark out nonsensical orders. You’re the kind of Staff NCO that would work his men like slaves so that you can chase some stupid medal to advance your career. Your men do all the work and you get all the credit.

You’re the kind of Staff NCO that would rather spend his time insulting us former disgruntled Marines, that you have helped to create, than to actually fix the problems that create disgruntled Marines. I bet this is one of the many ways you get your “masochist fix.” I bet after you retire, you’ll linger around the local PX to yell at current Marines. You won’t know anything outside of the Marine Corps because you’ll be too old and too stupid to know anything else.

Your men probably don’t respect you. Most likely, they secretly hate you but you are so full of yourself that you would believe that your Marines are “in awe” of you. If you were dying, they would unanimously agree to leave you to die and then tell the higher ups that there was nothing anyone can do.

If I was in the Marine Corps for another term, I probably wouldn’t be able to take it. All the injustices, all the immorality, all the selfishness, all the backstabbing, all the stupidity, all the inefficiency, all the arrogance, the list goes on and on. I told myself that I don’t need to take all this suffering. I can do better than this and with that idea, I got out honorably. For those still in the Marine Corps and want to get out, my hat goes off to you. It’s a hard journey but the light at the end of the tunnel is there and it is called the Post 9/11 GI Bill. You just have to walk toward it one day at a time.

I want you to know that I am glad that I am no longer part of this disorganization. The day I held my DD214, my eyes watered up. I knew that I was now a free man. Free to speak, free from stupid rules, free from oppression, free to be, free free FREE!!! So free that I can finally say what has always been on my mind… FUCK YOU MASTER GUNS!

Get rid of meaningless tasks and inefficiencies – Maj Peter J. Munson


Maj Peter J. Munson

“America is not at war. Marines are at war while America is at the mall.” This is the solemn refrain of Marines who have been in the thick of the fight for nearly 9 years. As an institution, however, the Marine Corps has no stones to cast. Despite this longest period of continuous warfare fought by an all-volunteer force, the Marine Corps as an institution stubbornly remains a peacetime garrison bureaucracy. Marines and Marine units have accomplished a litany of valiant feats and key innovations since 2001, yet the institution as a whole has refused to come to terms with the fact that war demands prioritization and that a decade of war demands a thorough clearing of the bureaucratic deadwood that has accumulated in the peacetime Marine Corps. The failure of the Marine Corps’ institutional leadership to streamline requirements and prioritize Marines’ efforts with an eye toward our sole reason for being (winning the Nation’s battles) detracts from combat readiness, negatively impacts safety, and drives combat-hardened Marines out of the Corps. As an institution, we have perverted our can-do culture and failed our Marines by imagining we can do more with less. As we near a decade of continuous combat operations, it is high time that we reevaluate our priorities, shed the load of inefficient and meaningless tasks, and shift our mindset from doing more with less, to doing what matters with less.

Multiple factors collude to pile our Marines high with an ever-increasing “soldier’s load” of tasks. These range from meaningful administrative and predeployment training to bureaucratic busy work to outright time wasting. Because we have not had the moral courage to acknowledge that even Marines can’t do everything, we are breaking our Marines’ backs under the weight of countless, unprioritized commitments. The rhythm of prolonged combat forces a grinding cycle of training and deployment, while hard-won battlefield lessons have demanded additional training and education for all Marines. These commitments have been layered on top of an already busy peacetime routine, while information technology and a bureaucracy that rewards “good ideas” and preventatives that can be summarized in fitness report bullets have peppered Marines with even more requirements from all levels of the institution. New tasks come down via email or Marine administrative messages weekly, each an emergency. In this environment where everything is a priority, nothing is a priority, and life becomes a constant juggle of dropping one task to complete another. While we say we are not a zero-defect Service, the ease with which the term “failure of leadership” is tossed about means that Marines prioritize not on lines of combat readiness, mission accomplishment, or safety but by focusing on those tasks that are most likely to draw higher headquarters’ attention if not quickly completed.

Institutionally, every incident is answered with new levels of centrally directed and provided training, usually accompanied by tracking and reporting requirements. If not computer-based, training is all too often provided in mass briefings. Both venues are utter failures. Computer-based training is generally clicked through with the volume muted while busy Marines complete other work. Mass briefings are received by sullen audiences resentful of having their time wasted on topics they already know by rote. Recently, when an O-6 briefing an audience of over 1,000 Marines accidentally closed his Microsoft PowerPoint presentation, he was met with universal applause in an open (and perhaps deserved) show of disrespect. Marines are hostile to endless training requirements, but more importantly, they disrespect the centralized and impersonal approach to issues that should fundamentally be handled by small unit leadership. There is no personal approach to training and thus no buy-in when Marines are individually huddled in front of computers or passively sitting through a mass brief.

Small unit leaders, who are positioned to make a much greater impact, are unable to ply their trade as time and opportunities for them to lead, mentor, and counsel their Marines are whittled away. What senior leaders do not consider is how their failure to properly prioritize their requirements has handed small unit leaders the impossible mission of doing everything with less. This state of affairs has come about because structurally the Marine Corps has no incentive for efficient use of manpower. As a government institution, it has no profit motive driving efficiencies. The military is unique among government institutions in being an almost wholly salaried Service of individuals who can be ordered to work any hours a commander desires. There is no payroll penalty to inefficient use of manpower. Among the Services, the Marine Corps is unique in having a culture that exalts doing the impossible on minimal resources and penalizes negative feedback signals on the rare occasion when they are pushed up the chain of command, further compounding the problem. Over the past decade we have become extremely meticulous about tracking and optimizing the efficiency of equipment utilization, yet while we pay lip service to the toll of high operational tempo, we have done virtually nothing to optimize the utilization of our most precious resource—our Marines.

The growing accumulation of tasks owes itself to two key phenomena. First, information technology has made it far too easy for disconnected staff sections at echelons above reality to levy training and other requirements. “Good ideas” are quickly packaged electronically and rained down on thousands of Marines below with little thought given to the accumulated man-hour cost and the other priorities with which they compete. With the profusion of special staff sections and their alternate chains of tasking and reporting, commanders easily lose track of the requirements levied in their names. These requirements all too often come with a demand for rapid action and “by name” reporting of completion that can be tracked back up at the stratosphere. The ease with which such requirements are levied means that little cost-benefit analysis is done, and there is no appetite suppressant mechanism to prevent overtasking.

Second, at lower levels of the chain of command, the Marine Corps’ culture and promotion system prevent the sort of feedback that is needed to signal the absurdity of the situation. Can-do culture, a near-zero-defects promotion system, and a dangerous trend of groupthink, reinforced by the echo chamber that Marines live in, all prevent Marine leaders from saying “enough is enough.” At the lower levels of the chain of command, the absurdity of the current climate is clear, yet leaders show a lack of the moral courage required to demand a better way.

In a world where everything is a priority, nothing is a priority. Worse, Marines begin to make up their own priorities in the absence of guidance. Key personnel, the busiest Marines in the unit, strive to juggle all balls, accomplishing the requirements expected of their Marines, then comforting themselves with the thought, “If we can find time to do it, then so can our Marines.” Yet our Marines may not be able to juggle tasks as swiftly and efficiently. They also may have other tasks, layered on by subordinate leaders, adding to their load. Unable to do all things well, Marines make up their own priorities. The commander knows what is important and what is not, but the signals the institution is sending to his Marines are ambiguous at best. Often the most trivial of tasks in the grand scheme of our true mission are tracked by “hit lists,” yet the institutional leadership does not get a list of what Marines forgo in order to get these trivial tasks done. They don’t get the list of the Marines who skip lunch, put off medical appointments, cut corners on maintenance or training practices, fail to thoroughly inspect the work of others, or spend extra time at work rather than with their families. This list seems benign, but these things, among others, are the real and direct results of misguided leadership, and each of them is impacting the lives of our Marines. Together they directly contribute to decreased personnel and material readiness at best and suicides, motor vehicle accidents, and ground and aviation mishaps at worst. Marine leaders soul searching for ways to reduce these misfortunes should start with deep introspection as to whether they have lived up to their moral obligations to care for their Marines, even if that means telling superiors far removed from the realities of daily life at the unit level that they simply cannot accomplish all of their tasks and must drop some to focus on what matters. Senior leadership must embrace a new ethos of doing what matters with less.

The Marine Corps speaks to the promotion of moral courage, but beyond the shallow willingness to criticize uniform infractions and haircuts, moral cowardice is the way to avoid negative recognition and climb the ranks while those who truly care about doing what matters begin to look for the exit. If the Marine Corps is serious about operational excellence and improving safety, it must return to the true tenets of its institutional culture. This is no small matter and requires the involvement of institutional leadership at all levels. First, “doing more with less” is short for “doing more than others would with less.” In reality, it means doing what matters to the Marine Corps in its role as the Nation’s expeditionary force with less. To excel at doing what matters, we must acknowledge what does not matter, or at least does not matter as much. Second, in doing what matters with less, the Corps must return to its professed tenets by trusting and empowering junior leaders.

Redundant reports should be eliminated, inefficient training streamlined, and wasteful administrative burdens reduced. Could information assurance training be conducted in a less gratingly wasteful way? Once we have our nuclear, biological, and chemical and rifle range briefs memorized, can we test out and proceed directly to the practical application perhaps? Better yet, can we use that time for more advanced training? How many hours are wasted annually shuffling paperwork through 10 wickets to get a signature that should not be required on a naval format letter that required three revisions to ensure the format was correct and the signature block was positioned perfectly? The opportunities are legion, but a shift must occur in mindset for them to become apparent.

In many cases, load shedding of unnecessary tasks will involve culling superficialities for which the Corps has a deep institutional fondness. There is an element of institutional pride and unit cohesion in the appearance issue, but the focus on superficialities often comes at an expense to substance. Consider the over 800 man-hours invested in preparation for a battalion-level change of command. A unit may be thought to be unprofessional if it forewent the “troop and stomp” for a simpler ceremony, but would it not be much more substantively professional if it spent that 800 man-hours training for its primary mission? Although the thought is certainly a bridge too far, would Marines be better off if they spent less time at the barber shop and more time in professional study, combat conditioning, or with their families? Did anyone tell Chesty Puller he was not a motivated Marine because he did not have a high and tight? In another instance, consider the time wasting that goes on around the Corps during the weekly field day. How many clean windows are dutifully wiped down? How many floors could be buffed monthly instead of weekly? Beyond the time issue, undue focus on superficialities erodes Marines’ confidence that the institution cares about what truly matters.

Finally, we must entrust our junior leaders to do those things that do matter. If there is training to be done, provide small unit leaders with training aids and let them run it. Let these leaders lead. They cannot do any worse in motivating their Marines to succeed than a computer or the speaker at the front of the auditorium. Given properly prioritized missions and the time to accomplish them, these Marines will need no hit lists to make it happen.


Source: http://www.mca-marines.org/gazette/article/doing-what-matters-less